The Natural Selection Examination
by lyrisca
Summary: Drunk and disillusioned by her dating options following her break-up with Leonard, Penny comes home from the club early and decides to hang out with Sheldon for the night. Things get weird. Very, very weird...
1. Chapter 1

Penny was drunk. Not the level of drunk that made the world spin and took away all thought control, thankfully, but she was finding it difficult to make her way up the four flights of stairs to her apartment in three-inch heels. The heels were gold, strappy, and fabulous; they matched her eye-catching new dress, which showed just enough leg and cleavage to make every guy she passed do a double-take. She had felt like a million bucks when she left three hours before, and she wanted to feel like a million bucks now. Unfortunately, she instead felt terribly depressed. And drunk, of course.

"God damn stairs," she muttered to herself as she continued her trek. This was all Leonard's fault. She had met some great guys at the club that would have satisfied all of her needs six months ago. They were probably great in bed and they would buy her things. But ultimately, the problem was that they were dumb, and Penny had recently discovered, much to her annoyance, that she no longer had a high tolerance for dumb men. Sure, she couldn't understand what Leonard and the other guys were talking about half of the time (let's be honest, it was more than half of the time), but when she and Leonard started dating, she worked up the courage to start asking him questions about his work. He wasn't always great at giving her clear answers, but he would throw enough out there for her to Google it and figure out the rest on her own. There was a time when she had been a good student, back before boys and booze and acting aspirations entered her life, and she had always retained a healthy interest in learning new things. She now realized she needed to be with someone who could teach her new things every day.

Of course, she also needed someone with a spine and an ounce of independence, which was why she broke it off. As a self-proclaimed "big ol' five" she knew she needed someone who would challenge her, and life with Leonard was just… too easy. She occasionally wanted to get fired up and fight with a person, to spar verbally and angrily until one of them buckled under the pressure and both succumbed to the soothing balm of makeup sex. She had to feel passions outside of love to be happy with a person. But with Leonard, it had been all about cuddling and warm fuzzy feelings and him yielding to her immediately when there was a problem. She felt guilty about it, but she knew he needed somebody that could appreciate his sweetness, and she knew she needed somebody that could appreciate her intensity.

And so there she was, drunk and dissatisfied and feeling ridiculous in her gold shoes, which now felt gaudy to her. She had made it to the top of the steps, at least, and she found herself staring at the door to apartment 4A. A quick glance at her cell phone revealed that it was only 10 pm; the guys were probably still up. Two weeks after the break-up, hanging out with Leonard was still awkward, but it wasn't as bad if the others were around and it sounded like a better plan than sitting on her couch and watching some depressingly sappy romantic comedy with a pint of ice cream and a glass of cheap wine. Only slightly better, but still.

She wobbled over to the door across from her own and knocked twice. As usual, Sheldon opened the door; unusually, the apartment behind him seemed quiet. He had a bleary look in his eyes, like he had spent too much time in front of his laptop.

"Hello, Penny," he said, rather cautiously. Penny peered past him into the empty apartment. "Are you going somewhere?" Penny looked back at him and he glanced downward, indicating her club attire.

"Just got back." She put a hand against the doorframe to steady herself. "Where is everybody?"

"Hmm. Considering the usual duration of your outings, you have returned home incredibly early." Turning away from Penny, he covered the short distance between the door and his desk and sat down. "Did you come by to speak with Leonard?"

Penny decided this was as much of an invitation to come in as she was going to get out of Sheldon. She shut the door behind her and dropped unceremoniously onto the couch. "Not… specifically him. But you didn't answer my question. Did they all go out or something?"

Sheldon had promptly resumed typing, and did not stop to answer her. "Wolowitz and Koothrappali determined that a trip to Las Vegas was in order, so as to help Leonard recover from his ill-fated relationship with you. They left early this afternoon." He paused, sighed, and looked back at her. "Leonard told me not to tell you where he was going, but I can't imagine why he wouldn't want you to know. And he knows how terrible I am at keeping secrets. I sincerely hope that one day the human race will realize that secrets do nothing but ruin lives and bring hardship to all parties involved."

"Having no secrets has certainly helped you out," Penny quipped, expecting a glare. But he had already resumed typing and her sarcasm lost on him. She was a little hurt that Leonard disappeared to Vegas without telling her, but she supposed she couldn't be too angry about it; it wasn't any of her business anymore what he did or where he went. A pang of guilt ran through her and she wondered if her friendship with him would ever recover from this.

Penny let herself sink further into the couch and listened to Sheldon type. He was focused and obviously had no interest in entertaining her, but even Sheldon's company seemed better than no company at all. Which was a pretty good indication that she was in bad shape. "Whatcha doing?" she asked, trying to keep her words from slurring. Too much to drink.

"Writing a manuscript addressing low scale supergravity mediation in the Brane world scenario and hidden sector phenomenology." He said the words in a manner that suggested he was talking about something normal, like making a cup of tea or watching television. Penny had pulled out something about super gravity and brains, but knew better than to ask him to translate in her current state. He hadn't turned around and was still typing furiously.

"You sure know how to have fun on a Friday night, Sheldon," she said, drenching her words in sarcasm. This time she was rewarded by Sheldon turning around and giving her a look.

"You know perfectly well that I relish in any opportunity to do my work in relative silence. This is, in fact, my perfect imagined scenario for 'fun on a Friday night'. Except that you are currently interrupting it with your queries."

Penny knew this was probably supposed to be her hint to leave, but she pressed on. "Sheldon, let's watch a movie. Doing work on a Friday night is boring."

"I don't want to watch a movie, Penny. I want to finish my manuscript and submit it to _The International Journal of Theoretical Physics_ before I go to sleep." He resumed typing. "And anyway, you always want me to watch some inane romantic comedy like _Bridget Jones's Diary_ or _Love Actually_ because you so thoroughly enjoy projecting yourself onto the characters and imagining that—"

"We can watch Star Wars," she offered, her voice a sing-song.

Sheldon paused. "_…The Empire Strikes Back _or _Return of the Jedi_?"

"_Return of the Jedi_." She couldn't remember which one was his favorite, but apparently she had chosen well because his fingers were still hovering over the keyboard. "And we can make popcorn." And I can get another glass of wine to help me get through this movie, she thought to herself.

"What about hot cocoa?" Sheldon was peering at her over his shoulder now, his interest piqued. "You make it better than Leonard does."

How old was he? Eight? "Sure, sweetie, I'll make you some hot cocoa."

Sheldon sat still for a moment, considering. Then he pressed a button on his laptop and spun around in his chair. "I suppose a short break from writing wouldn't hurt…"

"Yay!" Penny jumped up from the couch and, having forgotten the type of shoes she was wearing, nearly fell over onto the coffee table. "I'm gonna go change and make popcorn and hot cocoa! Don't start the movie without me!"

Sheldon watched her leave, shook his head, and began searching for Leonard's copy of the movie.

* * *

After changing into a comfortable pair of pajamas and flip flops, Penny set to work on the snacks. She tossed a bag of popcorn into the microwave, filled the coffee machine with water for Sheldon's hot cocoa, and poured herself a glass of wine to drink while she waited. She guessed that it was a little lame to be excited about watching movies on a Saturday night with her genius next door neighbor, but it was an activity that she and Leonard had done often when they were together, and she missed it. She liked to watch other people's reactions to her favorite movies and even enjoyed some of the movies the guys had introduced her to. The Star Wars movies were pretty campy and the acting was atrocious (to her), but the plot was kind of cool and she could see why generations of nerdy children had been drawn in and had become attached to the original trilogy.

Taking the now-full coffee pot and setting it on the counter next to her, Penny grabbed a mug and filled it with cocoa powder. She then added the hot water and began to stir the mixture together. Sheldon had given her very precise instructions for making hot cocoa, but she had done it enough for him that she had the process memorized. After stirring for three minutes, she stuck a thermometer in the beverage (provided by Sheldon) and measured the temperature. 210 degrees… too hot. Damn!

She looked around in her fridge for something to cool the drink down with. What could she put in that Sheldon wouldn't notice? Milk would be great, but the carton on the top shelf had been in there for three weeks and had surely gone off. The only other chilled drinks she had were a couple of beers, a jug of orange juice and a half-empty bottle of Kahlua.

Kahlua… would that work?

She laughed mischievously and added as much as she could to the mug without overflowing. After stirring vigorously for another thirty seconds or so, she took a sip from the spoon, smiled, and put the spoon back in. (Sheldon would kill her if he knew she'd done that.) Perfect! She really was the master at making hot cocoa.

She somehow managed to carry the mug of hot cocoa, a bowl of popcorn, her wine glass, and the cheap bottle of wine across the hall without spilling anything. She kicked the door lightly with her foot instead of trying to free up a hand to knock. "Sheldon! My hands are full! Please open the door!"

The door swung open. Penny gratefully handed the cup of hot cocoa to the scientist. "There you go. One delicious mug of Penny's world-famous hot cocoa."

"I highly doubt that your skills are internationally renowned," Sheldon commented as he sniffed the contents of the mug. "Did you use the hot cocoa mix given to me by my Meemaw, which I left at your apartment last week after you tried to use store-bought mix?"

"Yes."

"Did you bring the water to a temperature of exactly 190 degrees Fahrenheit?"

"Yes."

Did you use a separate container to warm the water, so as to keep me from burning my fingers on the mug?"

"Of course."

"Did you stir the mixture for precisely three minutes, being sure to adequately blend the contents of the mug together?"

"Yes."

"Did you add a dollop of my favorite whipped cream to the top, completing the beverage?"

Penny pointed at the cup. "Obviously."

"Good." Satisfied, he took a tentative sip. Penny waited. He considered the drink thoughtfully. "Only my Meemaw makes a cup of cocoa better than this. As always, I laud your abilities. Please teach Leonard how to correctly follow directions so that I don't have to deal with his sorry excuse for hot cocoa in the future."

"I'm not sure Leonard wants to be learning anything from me right now, but sure," she muttered as she sat down on the couch and poured herself another glass of wine.

Sheldon took his seat next to Penny on the couch and scooped popcorn into a separate bowl. He refused to eat from a community bowl under any circumstances. "Do you not believe, as Howard and Raj do, that a weekend of debauchery and deviant behavior in Las Vegas will cure Leonard of his constant moping and lamentations regarding the end of his relationship with you?"

Penny sighed. "I don't want to talk about Leonard right now. Can we please just watch the movie?"

"Certainly." Penny raised an eyebrow and glanced over at him as he hit the 'play' button, expecting him to say more, but he was actually keeping quiet for once.

Surprised and relieved that she had managed to shut Sheldon up so easily, she settled back into the couch and waited for the movie to start.


	2. Chapter 2

"Ok, so, what they did to Han Solo… the freezing in carbonite thing… can that really be done?" Penny saw Sheldon's face twitch when she asked the question and couldn't resist giggling. "That was a dumb question. Wasn't it? It was."

"No, Penny; freezing a person, or anything for that matter, in carbonite is a fictitious practice. Carbonite was actually used as an early coal-mining explosive. However, within the study of low-temperature preservation known as cryonics, there are those who have paid large sums of money to have either their whole bodies or heads cryopreserved after their death in the hopes that future scientists will discover a way to revive them."

Penny gaped at him. "Seriously? You can pay money to have your head frozen?" She poured herself yet another glass of wine and sloshed a bit of it out on her pajama bottoms. "Oops."

Sheldon shook his head disapprovingly and handed her a napkin. "As I said, the process requires an extensive monetary commitment. Only a reasonably wealthy person would be able to afford it at this point in time." He sipped his hot cocoa as he thought. "According the highly unregulated but acceptably accurate forum known as Wikipedia, the famous baseball player Ted Williams is cryopreserved."

"That's so cool." Her nose still buried in her wine glass, Penny poked Sheldon in the arm. "Hey, are you gonna… cryopreserve… yourself when you die? You know, so that future generations can benefit from your genius and all."

Sheldon started at her touch and gave her a strange look that was one part confusion and one part exasperation. "My decision depends on how far the science advances while I am still alive. There are the problems of injury caused by preservation and ischemia, and the question of whether bringing someone back to life is even a possibility. Regardless, evolutionary theory suggests that the mutation resulting in my extreme intelligence will be passed on genetically if it is deemed beneficial for the purposes of survival. Simply put, I won't have to be around for my genius to benefit the future of mankind."

Penny rolled her eyes. "You're just lucky you were born in the here and now, and in a modernized society. If it came down to survival of the fittest, your scrawny butt wouldn't last five minutes."

"Yes, lucky me." A curt smile crossed his face. "And if trouble ever arises, I am sure your tomboyish agility and cornhusker charm will protect me from any and all potential dangers."

Penny stiff-armed him for the comment but couldn't resist a smile of her own. "Hey now, I can't help that I was brought up playing baseball and fighting the neighborhood boys for marbles and spare change. I may not be a genius but I think I've turned out pretty well, all things considered."

"If by 'pretty well' you mean that you are satisfied as a fledgling actress and overworked Cheesecake Factory waitress, then yes, I would certainly say that you have carved out your place in the world quite nicely."

Penny punched his arm this time, hard enough to hurt. The addition of alcohol was making Sheldon snarkier, and while it was playful snark, the comment hit a little too close to home. "Don't be a jerk. You know what I meant."

"Penny! That hurts!" Sheldon whined into his mug of hot cocoa and rubbed his arm. "Please stop hitting me. I only speak the truth."

"Well, not everybody wants to hear the truth every second of every day," Penny responded, sniffing a little. "It wouldn't kill you to be nice every once in a while, or to sugar-coat things a little bit. Especially right now, because I've had a bad day and I don't need you making fun of me for my crappy life."

"Why have you had a bad day?" Sheldon asked. Penny gave him a look of surprise; was he genuinely interested or just asking out of social convention? She couldn't tell.

"You don't want me dumping on you, Sheldon. And anyway, it has to do with Leonard, who is your friend. Our friend," she corrected quickly. "I don't feel like I should be talking about him behind his back."

"Understandable," Sheldon said. They both sat in silence for a moment and watched the movie; Han, Luke and company had just landed on the moon of Endor, and were surveying the landscape. Penny gulped down the remaining wine in her glass, poured more in, and groaned in frustration. Sheldon eyed her warily over the rim of his coffee mug.

"He just… he has TOTALLY screwed me UP!" She slammed the wine bottle down onto the table, making Sheldon jump. "I never used to have a problem dating guys who had nothing going on upstairs. As long as they looked great and bought me shoes, it didn't really matter. But then Leonard came along… ooooh, Leonard." She clenched her fists, pushed them into her thighs. "He just had to be soooo sweet and soooo goddamned smart. Now I just get annoyed when those dumb guys at the club try and chat me up. Now there have to be some neurons firing up there for me to be even somewhat interested. It's just awful!"

"And… this is problematic… because?" Sheldon flinched a little when she turned sharply to glare at him, but he continued on. "I would argue that it is… beneficial from a survival standpoint to have an intellectual interest in your potential mates. As we previously discussed, intelligence is a positive attribute to have in one's genetic pool, given current societal standards."

"Yeah, well, it's not making my life any easier." Another swig from the wine glass. "And what business do I have with a smart guy, anyway? What do I have to offer a guy like Leonard? Not much. Hello, I'm Penny, penniless waitress from Nebraska, nice to meet you. I've got nothin'."

"…Is that why you broke up with Leonard? Because you felt inferior?" The question hung in the air for a moment, and Penny wondered if there wasn't a little bit of truth to it.

"Maybe that's part of it," she admitted. "But for the most part, no, that wasn't the reason I broke up with him. He never made me feel stupid, not intentionally anyway. He was just… he was too nice. That's all."

Sheldon made a face, as though she had just said the most ridiculous thing ever. But all he said was, "Interesting."

"Yeah, tell me about it." She laughed, shaking her head. "I can't believe I just said all of that to you. I'm sorry, honey." She patted his leg gently. Clearly her hand touching him was way outside of his comfort zone, but he didn't pull away. Maybe out of a healthy fear of what she would do. "Would you like me to make you another cup of hot cocoa?"

"Yes, please."

"Sure thing." As she made a determined effort to walk to the door and across the hall without stumbling, she decided that a larger dose of Kahlua was definitely needed.

* * *

Once _Return of the Jedi_ was over, they decided to watch _The Empire Strikes Back_. Sheldon of course complained that they should have just started with _A New Hope_ if they were going to end up watching the entire trilogy in one sitting anyway, but Penny shushed him and told him that it was fun sometimes to do things out of order. Sheldon looked dubious but didn't argue with her.

A quarter of the way through the movie, Penny realized that she was having fun. She felt a little bad about venting her frustrations regarding Leonard to Sheldon, but getting it off of her chest had really helped. She felt more relaxed than she had in months, and she was enjoying the playful banter between herself and Sheldon.

It probably helped that she was approaching a level of intoxication that made it difficult to focus on the television screen and even harder to walk without grabbing onto things for support. She was suddenly very glad to be sitting on the couch in her Hello Kitty pajamas nursing her second bottle of wine instead of at the club in uncomfortable heels with a $10 drink in her hand.

Sheldon, for his part, was certainly not drunk, but she noticed that he was using hand gestures to make his points a little more than usual, and his face was flushed. He also wasn't shrinking away from her anymore when she poked or touched him. When she brought this to his attention, he blamed it on the psychological process of habituation or something like that, but she knew it was probably the alcohol.

On the TV, Han and Leia were kissing for the first time. Penny snorted at the scene. A thought came to her and she question was out of her mouth before she had time to mull it over. "Hey Sheldon… how come you've never had a girlfriend?"

Sheldon shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "…What kind of a question is that?"

"It's a pretty normal question," she responded. "So… how come? Are you not into girls? I'm not judging you or anything if that's what it is, I'm just curious."

"Penny!" he cried, looking mortified. Penny giggled drunkenly into her wine bottle. "I'm not… into… anything. It has never occurred to me to be into anything."

Penny gave him a look. "Whatever. Everybody's into something. Boys, girls, something in between. How can it just not occur to you? That's ridiculous."

"It's not ridiculous," he insisted. "Look at how incredibly productive I've been during my lifetime. And then look at Leonard, and look at you. I am one of the great thinkers of the 21st century. Leonard is… an experimental physicist. And you are a waitress at the Cheesecake Factory."

"And an aspiring actress," She corrected haughtily.

"Yes, that too. But if you look through history and see the great things that people have done, you marvel at them, but can you imagine what these people could have done if they were not bogged down by things like love, and heartbreak? Emotion is just a frayed wire in the well-oiled machine that is the human brain. Look at how miserable you and Leonard are. Look at how that puts limits on the things that you can do."

"Miserable? Who says I'm miserable? I'm far from miserable!" Penny huffed. "Did you ever maybe stop and think that there's more to life than solving problems or understanding the Universe? That maybe it's kind of nice to have somebody to share it all with?"

"No," Sheldon stated, his voice matter-of-fact. "It all seems to serve no purpose besides creating messes and distractions. And I have no need for either of those things."

"And what about having friends? What's the point? You could be living in a cave somewhere instead of interacting with the four people in your life who give a damn."

"I never said that all social interaction was pointless. Just intimate relationships and love. Friends are, at times, a difficult accommodation, and not one I make lightly. But the end result is generally… beneficial."

Penny threw popcorn at him. "You are so weird. And you know what? Someday, somebody's gonna come along and all of your suppressed emotions are going to come bubbling to the surface, and you'll just… you'll be a wreck, just like the rest of us. And I really need to pee," she realized suddenly. "Oh man. I'll be right back."

"Thank you ever so much for sharing," Sheldon said, watching her as she passed in front of him on her way to the bathroom, grabbing everything in sight for support.

"I must say," Sheldon remarked once she had returned and he had righted something she had knocked over on her way, "you have reached an impressive, albeit unnecessary, level of inebriation. That you haven't evacuated your stomach yet is an admirable accomplishment, however small."

"Oh, honey, you ain't seen nothin' yet," she slurred, stretching out on the couch and ignoring Sheldon's pained reaction to her poor grammar. "I have the alcohol tolerance of a man twice my size. And I am not a man," she pointed out.

"Duly noted," Sheldon said. "Penny, you're in my spot."

"No I'm not!" She smiled broadly at him.

"Yes, you are," He said, pointing to her legs. "More precisely, your legs are in my spot."

"What's your point?" She wiggled her toes. "What are you gonna do about it, Mr. PhD?"

"I have two PhDs," he countered. A muscle in his neck twitched. "Please move."

"What if I don't want to?" Raised eyebrows and a wicked grin challenged him. "You gonna make me move? You can't always get everything your way, Sheldon."

She thought for a moment that his eyes were going to bug out of his head. He stood there for a long time, just staring at her, but she refused to budge.

"Whatcha gonna do, huh? Huh? Come on, Sheldon, I don't have all d—"

Without warning, he did the last thing she expected him to: He grabbed both of her ankles, pulled her legs off of the couch, and promptly sat down before she could put them back.

Penny stared at him, her mouth hanging open in surprise. He wasn't looking at her, but she could see that his jaw was clenched, his eyebrows furrowed. She had meant to agitate him, but she didn't think he would actually DO anything about it.

"That wasn't very nice," she complained, frowning at him.

Sheldon seemed to be deeply focused on the television screen. "You were in my spot. You knew the risks."

Penny harrumphed and, glaring at him, stretched back out, placing her legs in his lap.

Sheldon looked down, realized he was touching her, and threw his hands up in surprised. He gaped at her, his face a mask of horror. "What are you doing?"

"I told you I wasn't gonna move," she shrugged. She moved to take a swig out of her wine bottle, but it was quickly confiscated by Sheldon. "Hey!"

"I think you've had enough to drink." He held the wine over the far arm of the couch, out of her reach. "You're becoming intolerable."

"Give me that back!" She retracted her legs from his lap and lunged over him, reaching for the bottle. His arms were longer than hers and the bottle remained just barely out of her reach. "Sheldon!" He wiggled the bottle over his head and she lunged again. When that didn't work, she opted to poke him in the ribs with two well-placed fingers. He cringed, and the bottle fell out of his hand, bouncing a little but not breaking. Penny could hear the wine fizzing as it poured out onto the hardwood floor.

"Oops," she mumbled.

It wasn't until then that she realized she was perched over Sheldon's lap, close enough to see the sheen of sweat on his brow. Her left hand was resting on his shoulder, having fallen there after the bottle slipped from his hand, and her right was still lightly pressed against his ribcage, where she had been viciously poking him. Sheldon was tense, like he had meant to immediately stand and clean up the mess, but was stopped short by the living roadblock that was Penny. He met her gaze cautiously, and she realized that his eyes were blue. Why had she never noticed that before?

"Penny," he uttered, almost gasping for air. He brought his hand down slowly, gripped her forearm lightly, and let his fingers trail down to the crook of her elbow. Penny felt goosebumps tickle her flesh in response. His gaze wandered down to where his hand was resting and back up again. He then blinked once, twice. "Penny." He said her name again, but it was more definite, more in control. "You've made a mess on my floor."

Penny wasn't as quick to snap back to reality. She continued staring at his eyes, didn't move. "What?"

"You've made a mess. On my floor."

"Oh. Oh. Shit!" She scrambled off of his lap, and he instantly sprang up and went to the kitchen for cleaning supplies. The world spun sickeningly, and Penny sat back heavily against the couch.

What the hell was _that_, anyway?


	3. Chapter 3

Penny sat on the opposite side of the couch from Sheldon and watched the credits roll. She had offered to help Sheldon clean up the mess on the floor, but he had waved her away and done it himself. She'd expected him to be furious, considering his extreme intolerance for disorder, but instead he just looked... strange. Intensely thoughtful, but with a frown. She wondered what he was thinking but didn't dare ask.

When the DVD looped back to the menu, they both remained glued to the couch in their respective spots, the silence awkward around them. When they finally spoke, it was simultaneous; Sheldon was asking if she wanted to watch the remaining movie, and she was mumbling something about how it was late, she should probably sleep. Penny waited for him to speak again, but he was quiet.

"I should probably go to sleep," she repeated.

"All right," Sheldon responded.

Slowly, Penny climbed off of the couch and made her way to the door. Sheldon stood up and followed her. When she turned around to face him, he was fidgeting, and didn't seem to know what to do with his hands. She suddenly felt awful for spiking his hot cocoa.

"Good night, Penny," Sheldon said. He was looking at her now, the strange expression still on his face.

"Good night," she responded, trying to smile through the awkward moment. "Thanks for watching movies with me tonight."

"You're welcome."

With that, Penny turned on her heel and exited as quickly as she could without making herself dizzy. When she turned slightly to shut the door behind her, she saw that he was still watching her.

Once she was back in her own apartment, Penny threw herself onto her bed and let the room spin around her. What in the world had just happened? And with Sheldon, of all people! She'd teased him about his views on love, and then she'd basically fallen into his lap and he'd looked at her like... well, like _that._ She remembered the feel of his fingers on her arm and shivered. Was it possible that she had managed to tease an emotional response out of Sheldon Cooper, the self-proclaimed master of apathy?

No, it was too weird, and she was too drunk to be thinking about it. Crawling under the covers, she closed her eyes and let the alcohol in her system lull her to sleep.

* * *

Penny awoke from a dreamless sleep with a hangover and a raging headache. She blinked groggily and stared at the clock; it read 7:15 am. Way, way too early. She groaned and rolled back over, but knew she might as well get up. A night of drinking always robbed her of sleep and had her up at some ridiculous morning hour.

She blindly reached out a hand and swiped at her nightstand, looking for her phone; she was supposed to be covering a shift for Bernadette at noon, but had a funny feeling that she wasn't going to make it in. She sent a text to her boss saying as much, pulled herself out of bed, and made her way to the bathroom, shedding her clothes in careless piles as she went.

As she waited for her shower to heat up, Penny popped three aspirins and glared disapprovingly at her reflection in the mirror. She had neglected to wash the makeup off of her face the night before; the smudged mascara and caked-on foundation felt grimy against her skin and looked even worse. Her hair was everywhere and her body was oddly marked on one side from lying against creased sheets and bunched pajamas for too long. If she were her own boyfriend, she wouldn't have touched herself with a ten-foot pole; Leonard, on the other hand, had always told her she was beautiful, even when she felt her ugliest. It had always annoyed her. She wasn't the type of girl who always went the extra mile to look her best, and she had never needed a guy to tell her she was pretty, especially during the times when she definitely wasn't.

Stop thinking about Leonard, she told herself as she stepped under the spray of the shower and let the water run through the tangles in her hair. For his sake, she hoped his trip to Las Vegas cured him of his 'lamentations', as Sheldon had put it.

Sheldon… oh, God. Memories of the night before came rushing back to her, and she resisted the urge to bang her head into the tile. Don't think about him, either. Just turn the water up, as hot as it will go, and wait for the aspirin to kick in.

She had been standing there, eyes closed, for several minutes when a loud thunk caused her to jump in surprise. She opened her eyes and saw that one of her heavier shampoo bottles had fallen from the shower ledge. As she bent to pick it up, another bottle fell; it hit her in the head on its way down and evoked a colourful string of swear words in response.

"What the fuck?" she muttered harshly, ignoring both bottles and clutching her head.

It was then that she noticed the ground beneath her was trembling.

An earthquake? She struggled to quell the panic rising in her breast. She'd never experienced an earthquake before, but that had to be what this was; everything around her was shaking, and she could hear the old shower pipes rattling in protest. She quickly turned off the water and threw a towel around herself. Her memories of grade school earthquake drills were foggy, but she seemed to recall climbing under her desk for protection from falling objects. The idea of her flimsy kitchen table being the only thing standing between her and violent force of an earthquake wasn't promising, but it was her only option.

The kitchen was already a wreck; discarded glasses had fallen and shattered, and a couple of her appliances were steadily making their way to the edge of the counter. She ignored them and dove under the table, silently praying that the crappy old apartment complex wouldn't collapse in on itself and kill her.

Thankfully, when the shaking stopped a handful of minutes later, the building was still standing and nothing heavy had tested the strength of the kitchen table. Shaky from fear, Penny crawled out from under the table and took a deep, calming breath. What a wonderful way to start the morning!

She looked around and sighed heavily; the earthquake certainly hadn't made her apartment look any neater. Hunting down the broom and dustbin, she swept up the shattered pieces of glass and tossed them into the trash can. She then started to pick up the various items that now littered her floor: her purse, an empty flower vase, several magazines, a half-eaten loaf of bread, and Sheldon's cocoa mix.

Should she check on Sheldon? She'd half-expected him to come knocking on her door in the middle of it all, complaining that the earthquake was interrupting his daily morning routine, which involved consuming fiber-laden breakfast cereal and watching Doctor Who. What if something had fallen on him and knocked him out? Not that she thought it would kill him to lose a few IQ points, but still.

When she crossed the hallway and knocked on the door, she was greeted by silence. Worried, she tried the doorknob, and was surprised to find that it was unlocked. The living room was trashed, but there was no sign of Sheldon.

"Sheldon?" she called as she looked around. The bathroom door was open; not in there. "Where are you?"

"Penny?" Sheldon's muffled voice came from behind his closed door. Relieved, she wrapped her fingers around the knob, but found it locked. Go figure.

When he opened the door to greet her, she noticed that he looked about as exhausted as she felt. His hair was tousled from sleep, and he was wearing his robe over his pajamas.

"I just wanted to make sure that you were all right," she said, peering past him. His comic book collection appeared to be spread out haphazardly on the floor.

"Of course I'm all right; the earthquake was very minor." He gave her a funny look. "Why are you wet?"

"What?" She looked down and realized she was still wearing a towel. Her hair was dripping water onto the floor. "Oh. I was… I was taking a shower."

"During the earthquake?" Sheldon narrowed his gaze. "Did you learn nothing during the numerous earthquake drills you must have experienced as a child? The safest location is one that offers overhead protection, such as under a table or desk, or one that provides—"

"No, Sheldon, I started my shower before the earthquake," she interjected impatiently. "Speaking of which, I'd really like to finish it. I'm glad you're ok. Good luck with your comic books."

"There is no luck involved; I simply need to re-arrange them chronologically." She rolled her eyes and turned, leaving him standing alone in his doorway.

She thought she heard him say, "I'm glad you are all right, as well" as she padded across the living room to the door.

* * *

Several hours later, Penny collapsed gratefully on the couch and closed her eyes. She'd felt so guilty about calling into work that she'd used the pilfered time to clean her apartment and chip away at the gigantic pile of laundry that had been growing in the corner of her bedroom for the past two weeks. After such a strange morning, it had felt great to crank the radio and focus on something besides her thoughts. Plus, it had gotten rid of her hangover.

As she drifted over the dividing line between wakefulness and sleep, surreal half-dreams clouded her thoughts; she could see Leonard in her mind's eye, his face scrunched in a myopic squint. He came closer and smiled, but the gesture looked half-hearted, sad. A hand reached out and cupped her face, but it wasn't Leonard's; his image had blurred into Sheldon. He held his other hand out to her, and she took it without hesitation.

Where are we going? she asked him as they walked through the murky dream-darkness together.

You'll see, he whispered. You'll see.

Penny… Penny…

Knock knock knock. "Penny." Knock knock knock. "Penny."

Her eyelids fluttered.

Knock knock knock. "Penny!"

She sat bolt upright, her heart beating fast. Jesus Christ!

The knocking cycled again. She rubbed her eyes and listened. He was almost yelling her name now, and his voice was laced with panic. Uh-oh.

"What's wrong?" she asked when she finally answered the door.

He looked incredibly flustered. "Good lord, it took you long enough! I thought I was going to have to break down the door!" Much to Penny's surprise, he walked right in without asking. "Turn on the news."

"What? Why? And I can't, I didn't pay my cable bill."

Sheldon let out an exasperated sigh, grabbed her arm, and pulled her out the door, toward his apartment.

"What the hell is going on?" she demanded, yanking her arm out of his grasp and stopping in the middle of the hallway.

"You need to see something," he said simply before stalking into his apartment. Penny followed him, incredulous; she'd never seen him so agitated. Something was very, very wrong.

He sat down in his spot on the couch and pointed at the TV. An unusual, angular object filled the screen; the camera zoomed in on a tiny speck next to the object, and revealed it as a dilapidated old truck. The object was impossibly large and impossibly shiny; it seemed to burn with the reflected light of the sun.

"…The impact of the craft outside of Las Vegas, Nevada, this morning resulted in a shockwave that was felt was far east as Colorado," the news anchor reported. "The craft entered Earth's atmosphere travelling at impossible speeds, but scientists at NASA are telling us that for something of its size, the craft made a relatively soft landing, suggesting that something – or someone – was able to control its descent. It is not clear where the craft came from, but it certainly does not appear to be a natural object. Simply put, it is possible that this craft may in fact contain the first evidence of intelligent life in the Universe besides ourselves."

"Holy shit," Penny whispered, slumping onto the couch next to Sheldon.

"My thoughts exactly," he mumbled.


	4. Chapter 4

Penny spent the rest of the afternoon glued in front of Sheldon's television, hoping for more information on the "shiny space thingy", a name she'd coined precisely because she knew it would annoy the hell out of Sheldon. As incredible as its appearance had been, though, nobody seemed entirely sure what to make of the spaceship; nothing had come out of it, intelligent being or otherwise, and the US Army was making damn sure that nobody tried to get inside, either. They had secured a human perimeter around the ship that stretched for miles and miles. Politicians both within and outside of the United States were already arguing about what needed to be done. Thankfully, it appeared that somebody up top was smart enough to realize that any action taken was going to piss off a good chunk of the world, because absolutely nothing at all was being done; news stations continued flashing pictures and milking the situation for all it was worth, but no one really had anything new to say. The entire world-changing event had been reduced to a waiting game.

Penny quickly realized that Sheldon was not very good at waiting. He insisted that they immediately jump in the car and drive to the landing spot; Penny told him that they most definitely wouldn't let him examine the thing, regardless of his ridiculously high IQ.

He'd already called Leonard three times, asking him when he'd be back; he and the other guys had been there when the ship landed, they had to know more than what was available on television and the Internet. Leonard kept telling him to be patient, which only made his eye twitch in frustration. She'd finally asked him to make her a cup of tea in an effort to give him something else to do.

"Although I've always hoped that First Contact would be made during my lifetime," Sheldon was saying as he placed the kettle on the stove, "I have to admit that this scenario is not exactly ideal. That the extra-terrestrials have not exited their craft suggests to me that they are either too different from human beings, biologically or technologically speaking, to survive on our world, or that they have nefarious reasons for visiting our planet."

"Really? Those are your only two options? What about the possibility that there's nobody in there? Or that they died during landing?"

"Or that they've sent a giant doomsday device to destroy all life on Earth and prepare the planet for colonization?" Sheldon suggested. "There are many possibilities, Penny, and most of them do not bode well for our species."

"Boy, you're just full of sunshine and happiness," Penny deadpanned. She joined him in the kitchen to put sugar in her tea cup. "What's your plan if the aliens do plan to kill us off, or enslave us, or whatever?"

"Well, if the extra-terrestrials have any sense, they will find a way to contaminate our food and water supplies. I plan to stock up when Leonard returns, before goods manufactured and processed post-ship landing can be placed on the shelves. I would suggest that you do the same, and limit your diet to only the food you prepare yourself in your home and only water that is boiled before being consumed."

Penny stared at him. "You're kidding."

"I most certainly am not. This unfortunately will result in the temporary elimination of such luxuries as Chinese takeout, but I would rather experience large disruptions in my schedule than die a food-related death." He removed the whistling tea kettle from the stove and poured hot water into Penny's cup. "In fact, I plan to cook this evening."

"...Seriously?" She blinked. "You can cook?"

"Of course I can cook, Penny. I grew up in Texas. I can deep fry anything, and because my mother always had a soft spot in her heart for Asian cuisine, I am well-versed in stir-fry dishes as well. You are welcome to partake if you'd like. Do you enjoy Pad Thai?"

"If it's food, and it's free, I'll eat it," she replied, sipping her tea.

"Good." He poured the leftover hot water into a glass and placed it in the refrigerator. "In that case, will you drive me to the supermarket?"

* * *

An hour and several large bags of groceries later, Penny found herself cutting up vegetables for Sheldon's Pad Thai with a knife that was far sharper than she suspected it needed to be. She'd already had to go for band-aids twice. She flicked her eyes toward the television every couple of minutes, hoping for spaceship-related news.

"Traditional Pad Thai does not call for the vegetables that you are doing such a poor job of cutting up," Sheldon pointed out as he stirred the rice noodles and tofu on the stove. "Bean sprouts and cabbage, yes, but you will find nary a carrot or zucchini chunk in any incarnation of the dish in Thailand."

"What do you know, Sheldon? You've never been to Thailand." She scraped another batch of vegetables off of the cutting board and into a bowl. "And anyway, vegetables are good for you. Adding them isn't going to hurt anything."

"Well, regardless, I will be cooking them in a separate skillet. If you wish to taint your dinner, feel free to mix them in on your plate."

The sound of the door opening made them both look up. Leonard hurried inside, followed closely by Howard and Raj.

"Hi guys!" Penny greeted them brightly. "I'm all done with the vegetables," she said to Sheldon, handing him the bowl.

"Marvelous," he grumbled. He then turned his glare on Leonard. "Hello, Leonard. You are late, and you have been withholding information from me."

Leonard ignored Penny's greeting and Sheldon's accusation; he was too busy staring at them to respond. "What's going on? …You're cooking? It's a Saturday!"

"Sheldon is convinced the aliens are going to poison our food and water supply and take over the planet," Penny explained before Sheldon could begin speaking. "He already stockpiled."

"I will no longer be eating out," Sheldon clarified. "I would recommend that the rest of you follow suit to avoid certain death."

"Don't be ridiculous, Sheldon! You can't just stop buying food—"

"I am never ridiculous. You know full well that I have a two years' supply of rations stored under my bed. I also plan to begin growing my own fruits and vegetables."

"Jeez, we leave him alone for a day and he's even crazier than he was when we left," Howard complained to Raj, who nodded in agreement.

"And Penny, what are you doing, enabling him? You took him shopping?"

"Hey, free food," she said, shrugging and stealing a raw carrot from the bowl in Sheldon's hands.

"Penny has been here with me all day, following the news and eagerly awaiting new information. I offered to cook enough for the both of us if she agreed to drive me to the supermarket."

"Looks like he started peeing on Leonard's stuff while we were gone, too," Howard said in a low voice. Penny and Leonard simultaneously turned to glare at him.

"What exactly is THAT supposed to mean?" Penny asked angrily, crossing her arms.

"I don't know what Howard is talking about," Sheldon interrupted, "But there are certainly more important things to discuss. Leonard, you never explained yourself. What do you know about the spacecraft?"

"About the same as you," Leonard said, still glaring at Howard. "We didn't even see the ship land. We just looked outside when the earthquake began, and there it was. By the time we made it to the landing site, a perimeter had already been established around the entire ship."

Sheldon looked sorely disappointed. "Really? That's all you have? Why in the world did you even bother coming home early?"

"Well, after such an eventful day, none of us were really in the mood for another night of deviant behavior."

"That's not true," Howard muttered. "Raj and I were definitely game, seeing as we actually went out and met women last night. Leonard's the one who insisted we come home today."

"The two middle-aged alcoholics you were both hitting on do not count," Leonard said, rolling his eyes. "And if I recall correctly, they rejected you after you bought them four drinks a piece."

"Hey, it's better than sitting at the bar and crying into our beer, which is pretty much what you did all night—"

"Guys, guys!" Penny yelled over them. "Come on, stop bickering. The food's almost done; let's just sit down, have a nice dinner, and see if anything new has happened with the space thingy."

"Excuse me, Penny, but I only made enough food to satiate the two of us. If you are going to offer them Pad Thai, I hope you know that they will be eating from your portion."

"You know what? That's just fine!" Leonard grabbed his keys out of the bowl and forcefully opened the door. "I didn't want any of your damn food anyway, Sheldon. I'm going for Chinese!" He slammed the door behind him and was gone.

The four of them stood in awkward silence for a moment and listened to the food sizzling on the stove. Raj whispered something into Howard's ear, and Howard nodded in agreement.

"Yeah… I'd rather take my chances with Leonard than hang out here and watch the odd couple eat." He and Raj headed for the door. "Peace!"

After they left, Penny planted her hands on the counter and gave Sheldon a heated glance. "Seriously, what is your problem?"

"I have no problems." Sheldon cocked his head to the side. "Oh, are you referring to my comment to Leonard? I did not make enough food for five people. Leonard refused to give me an expected arrival time, and as a result, I did not include him or the others in my cooking regimen. It's really quite simple."

"Yeah, well, you didn't have to be such a dick about it." Tossing the cutting board into the sink, Penny stomped over to the couch and sank heavily into the middle cushion. "I hope Leonard is ok."

Ten minutes later, Sheldon came over to the couch with two plates in hand. "I will apologize to Leonard if you think it prudent to do so." He held out one of the plates to her. "Dinner?"

Penny sighed, gave him a small smile, and set the plate in her lap. "Thanks."

When she looked down, she realized he'd mixed the vegetables in with the noodles for her.

* * *

A few hours later, Penny was searching for news on her laptop when she heard a knock on her door.

"Oh, hi, Leonard," she said, opening the door wider to let him in. He stood his ground in the doorway, looking sheepish.

"Hi. I came over to apologize for flipping out earlier… and for not telling you about the Las Vegas trip," he said, not looking at her.

"It's not a big deal, Leonard," she said, leaning on the door. "And anyway, it's not any of my business what you do or where you go."

She hadn't meant for the statement to sting, but he flinched a little when she said it. "I know. But you know I feel bad anyway." He looked up at her. "I've felt bad a lot lately."

"Leonard…" she didn't know what to do, or say. She pulled him into a hug; he hesitated for a moment, and then hugged her back. "Leonard, I'm so sorry. You're one of my best friends, and I feel terrible that this… that we've…"

"That you've broken my heart?" he said, his voice muffled by her shoulder. She sighed in response.

"Penny," he whispered, "I don't think I can be your friend right now."

Penny stiffened a little in shock. "What?"

"I think I need some time to, you know, recover." He backed away from her embrace. "We're going to see each other, obviously, and I know you're friends with the guys. But I just… is there any way you can do this for me, for a while? I've been so miserable for the past two weeks, and I know it's because you're such a strong force in my life and I've just grown accustomed to… to you. Your touch, your smile. I just need a break."

Penny swallowed hard, trying to fight the lump forming in her throat. "If that's what you need."

"I think it is." His eyes were watery. "I wish I was stronger, or more mature, or whatever I would need to be to get past our relationship quickly and be friends again. But it's too hard right now. I hope you understand."

"I do," she whispered, her own heart breaking a little.

"I'm glad," he said, trying to smile. "Thanks, Penny. I'll… I'll see you around."

"Ok," she said quietly.

Once Leonard returned to his own apartment, Penny placed her forehead against the door and let the tears fall.


	5. Chapter 5

True to her word, Penny spent the next two weeks apart from Leonard. This of course meant that she couldn't see the other guys, either; she would greet them and exchange pleasantries if she met them in the hallway, but she resisted the urge to burst into the apartment across the hall when she was bored, or lonely, or needed milk. Howard and Raj seemed to understand the situation; they didn't ask why she wasn't around anymore. Sheldon, on the other hand, always seemed confused.

Curiously, Penny found herself missing her interactions with Sheldon the most. She enjoyed her verbal spats with him, and on occasion she even found his childish nature endearing. Although she knew his theory about the food and water being contaminated was crazy, she found herself adhering to it anyway; it wasn't all that hard, considering she was too broke to buy new food, and she always tried to avoid eating the stuff from work. However, one could only survive on tea and crackers for so long, and she was seriously considering going food shopping when she met Sheldon, Howard, and Raj on the second floor.

"Hiya, guys," she said. "Whatcha up to?"

"We were just picking Sheldon up from work," Howard said, smiling broadly. "May I say, Penny, that you are looking absolutely stunning today?"

"Thank you, Howard," Penny said, smiling in return. She was so happy to see them that she didn't even mind Howard's flirty, bordering on lecherous behavior. But then she frowned, thinking. "Wait. Doesn't Leonard normally bring you home, Sheldon?"

"Yes," Sheldon said, "But he is working late tonight, and I was getting hungry."

"Sheldon has been cooking for us every night," Howard explained. "I still think his theory is insane, but I won't argue with free food." Raj nodded enthusiastically in agreement.

"A smart man never argues with free food," Penny remarked.

"Would you like to join us for dinner tonight, Penny?" Sheldon asked. If she didn't know any better, she'd say that he looked hopeful.

"Oh… well… I probably shouldn't. Thank you, though."

"You shouldn't? Why in the world—"

"She said no, Sheldon, so don't worry about it. We'll see you around, lovely lady."

"Sure." She took a few steps toward the next set of stairs.

"Penny," Sheldon called after her, making her stop and turn around. "Shall I bring you a plate later? I am making spaghetti with hot dogs tonight."

Penny couldn't help but grin. "Actually, that would be great. That's really sweet of you, Sheldon."

A little smile raised the corners of his mouth. "I will see you later, then. Have a good evening."

"You too."

She waited until the guys had made their way up the two flights of steps before following them. Putting off grocery shopping for another day meant that she could shop online for shoes!

* * *

Penny had given up shoe shopping and was reading about the spaceship when Sheldon knocked thrice on her door. She couldn't believe that absolutely nothing had changed in two weeks; the thing was still being watched, and the ship's hull had even been tested by scientists, but nobody could figure out what it was made of. It was all very weird.

"Come in," she said to Sheldon when she opened the door. He was holding a steaming plate of spaghetti, peppered lightly with little chunks of hot dog. A real Italian treat, indeed.

"Good Lord, Penny, have you not picked up your apartment since the earthquake hit?" Sheldon said, taking in the state of the living room. "Or was there another earthquake that I missed?"

"Shut up," she said as she took the plate from his hands. "And thanks. I'm starving!"

Sheldon looked around for a place to perch, but seemed to be unable to find a satisfactory spot. He stood next to the couch instead. "Have you been heeding my advice regarding food and water intake?"

"I have, actually," Penny said before stuffing her mouth full of spaghetti. She swallowed before continuing. "I'm nearly out of food, though. I was thinking about going shopping…"

"You can't do that!" Sheldon exclaimed. "Penny, anything that you buy now will most certainly be contaminated. You are probably serving people deadly meals at the Cheesecake Factory on a daily basis."

"Nobody has died yet, Sheldon," she reminded him. "In fact, nothing bad has happened since that thing landed outside of Las Vegas. I think the food supply is probably safe."

"Nonsense," Sheldon said, shaking his head. "You will just have to resume eating dinner with us."

Penny gave him a look. "You know I can't do that. Leonard doesn't want me around right now."

"He doesn't?" Sheldon asked, confused. "I was unaware of this. He mentioned that you wouldn't be around much anymore, but did not give a reason as to why."

That rat bastard! "Leonard asked me to give him some space. He said he didn't think he could be my friend right now. I can't believe he didn't tell you."

"Interesting. Does this mean that by extension, we are no longer friends? I am unclear on the social implications."

"No, Sheldon, of course not." She reached out and patted his leg, and he finally sat down next to her. "I've told you before; no matter what happens between Leonard and me, you and I are still friends. It's just… it's complicated. You live with him, and Howard and Raj are friends with both of you, so I can't very well hang out with you guys without seeing him and going against his wishes."

"I understand." He considered. "In that case, I will simply bring you dinner every night. You can text me when you are home."

"Oh, Sheldon, that's very sweet, but you really don't have to. I can just—"

"—Buy food from the supermarket and die a horrible death? That is unacceptable. I prefer my friends to be alive."

Penny shook her head in disbelief. She was touched by his kindness, even if it was hidden beneath a thick veneer of crazy. "Ok, fine. But only under one condition."

"What is it?"

"You have to stick around and talk to me while I eat." She smiled. "And bring Howard and Raj with you if Leonard is working late. I miss seeing you guys."

"I accept your condition." He stood back up. "For now, however, I must go. It is Halo night, and Howard and Raj are waiting on me. Are you sure you don't want to join? Because Leonard is not home, we are short one person."

"Well… I guess I can sneak over for a little while…" She put her finished plate on the coffee table and hopped up. "Bring on the Halo!"

"Excellent," Sheldon said, heading for the door.

* * *

And so began the daily ritual of eating dinner with Sheldon. At first she had tried to pay him for the food, but he refused to take her money; "As I've told you before, Penny, it was a lot of work to accommodate you in my life, and I'd hate for that work to have been in vain. Anyway, for the time being, I have plenty of food. Just eat." And so she did eat, always leaving some food on her plate for lunch the next day. Work had been cutting her hours, so she was very grateful for the daily meals; she probably wouldn't have been able to afford to buy her own food, anyway, considering that almost every dollar she made was being used to pay rent, or electricity, or the water bill.

She was also glad to have Sheldon back as a daily presence in her life, strangely enough. Ever since the weird incident on the couch, he had been treating her differently; he still chastized her on occasion and always had some sort of smartass comment at the ready, but behind the big words, she could always see a hint of something else. Affection? Concern? She couldn't tell. She also figured it wasn't anything he himself had noticed. But it was there nonetheless, and she was interested to see where it would take him.

She wondered how Leonard felt about Sheldon hanging out at her place every evening. One night, as she twirled lo mein noodles around her fork, she asked Sheldon as much.

"Leonard is always silent when I tell him I am going across the hall," Sheldon responded between sips of hot chocolate. "I believe his feelings toward the matter are ambivalent."

Penny highly doubted that, but she made a noise of agreement anyway. "How is he, anyway? I haven't seen him at all this week."

"Leonard is ill," Sheldon replied quietly. "He has been in bed for the past two days."

Penny's eyes widened. "Ill? What's wrong with him? Does he have that bug that's going around? A lot of people at work have been out sick because of it."

Sheldon instantly scooted away from her on the couch. She rolled her eyes. "Sheldon, I showered when I got home, and I promise I won't throw up on you. I'm fine."

He relaxed a little. "I hope so. You haven't eaten anything besides what I've been cooking for you?"

"No, of course not." She gestured with her fork. "Don't you think your theory has become a little silly, though? Nobody's died yet, and no one on the news has said anything about the food being poisoned."

"But, people ARE sick," he pointed out. "And whatever has been done to the food and water may not be something that our technology can detect. I am not yet convinced that we are safe."

"What I can't believe," Penny mumbled, her mouth full, "Is that they haven't gotten the damn thing open yet. I mean… we can break atoms apart, but we can't cut through a few feet of weird metal? Come on."

Sheldon blinked. "Penny, did you just reference nuclear fission in conversation?"

"So what if I did?" She had to fight the urge to grin. "Sometimes, when I get tired of online shopping, I try to figure out what the hell it is that you do for a living."

"I see." When she saw the look on his face, she had to smother her laughter with a napkin. "Since when do you have any interest in what I do for a living?"

"Since always," she choked, trying to regain her composure. "Why don't you shut up and pick a movie? If you don't, I'm putting in _Sixteen Candles_."

A number of hours later, Penny opened her eyes slowly and was greeted by television static. Sheldon had wedged himself into the corner of the couch and was sleeping next to her. The harsh light of the television danced across his face and left distorted shadows in the hollows of his cheeks. Smiling gently, Penny covered him with a blanket and watched him sleep for a moment before turning the television off and closing her eyes again.

A quiet knock on the door roused her from sleep a second time. Next to her, Sheldon stirred but did not wake. Wondering who in the hell was bothering her at this hour, she padded toward the door and glanced through the peephole.

It was Leonard. He was wrapped in a blanket and looked miserable. When Penny opened the door, she noticed that his face was pale and haggard. He appeared to be on the verge of passing out.

"Jesus, Leonard, what's wrong?" she asked, a little stab of worry running through her. He wavered a little, and she reached out to steady him. "Are you ok?"

"Need to go… to hospital," he whispered through chattering teeth. "Where… Sheldon?"

"He's here, he's on the couch. We fell asleep watching a movie."

Sheldon jumped up at the sound of his name. "What? What's going on?"

"Leonard needs to go to the hospital. He's… Leonard!" She barely caught him as he fell forward, unconscious. "Shit! Sheldon, help me!"

They carried him over to the couch. Penny gingerly cupped his unmoving face with her hand and gave Sheldon a panicked look. "He's burning up. I don't think we can carry him down four flights of steps…"

"I will call for an ambulance." Sheldon whipped out his phone and dialed quickly, but he soon pulled it from his ear, frowning. "There's no dial tone. The network appears to be down."

Penny tried using her phone, but the call refused to connect. "Shit!" she uttered again. "What are we gonna do?"

From the couch, Leonard let out a small moan; Penny sighed in relief. "Leonard! Leonard, honey, our phones don't work. We need to carry you down the stairs. Can you try to help us?"

He mumbled something in reply and tried to sit up. Grabbing her purse and slipping it over one shoulder, Penny wrapped an arm around Leonard's middle and helped him up. Sheldon took the other side, and slowly, the three of them made their way down the stairs.

"You'll be ok," Penny said softly to Leonard, her voice wavering. She looked to Sheldon for support. "He'll be ok, right?"

"Yes," Sheldon responded, but the look of deep concern on his face said otherwise.


	6. Chapter 6

The emergency room was absolute chaos. Nurses and doctors were moving from room to room at a frenetic pace, and the waiting room was filled to the brim with sick patients. Penny hunted down a free chair for Leonard while Sheldon went to retrieve paperwork from the front desk.

"How you holding up?" Penny asked Leonard as she helped him sit down.

"Feel… horrible," he mumbled, his eyes closed.

"Hang in there," she said, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "We'll get you in to see a doctor soon."

"This is the most disorganized hospital I have ever had the displeasure of visiting," Sheldon complained when he returned nearly fifteen minutes later. "The nurses at the front desk have completely run out of admittance forms and claim that they are too busy to make copies; when I told them of Leonard's current state, they told me to "get in line" and suggested I take a number, sit down, and shut up."

Penny ran a hand through her hair. "So that's it? We just have to sit here and watch Leonard get worse?"

"Of course not." Sheldon gestured down the hall past the front desk. "After expressing my deep concern for the field of medicine and describing, in detail, the various ailments Leonard has suffered from for the past two days and nights, one of the nurses told me to, and I quote, "shut the goddamn hell up" and take Leonard down to room 42."

If the situation were less dire, Penny would have laughed. Sheldon was the only person she knew who could get exactly what he wanted by being unyieldingly obnoxious.

As Sheldon and Penny were helping Leonard into the hospital bed in room 42, a frazzled nurse walked into the room and yelped in surprise.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't expecting anyone to be in here yet," she apologized. "Is this Mr. Lloyd?"

"No, this is Mr... Dr... Hofstadter," Penny clarified. "They ran out of admittance forms so you probably don't have any information. He's really sick."

"What are his symptoms?" the nurse asked, pulling a clipboard out of nowhere.

Sheldon butted in. "The patient has been complaining of nausea, vomiting, persistent headaches, aching joints, lethargy, dizziness, explosive diarrhea—"

"Sheldon..." Leonard moaned from the bed.

"Well, it's true," Sheldon responded. "He often becomes incredibly ill shortly after ingesting dairy products, but his current symptoms have been steadily escalating for the past two days, and he has had no dairy."

The nurse scribbled something on the clipboard. "Ok. I will try to get a doctor in here as quickly as I can." She turned to leave.

"Wait," Penny said, stopping her. "Is it always this busy here? The waiting room was packed."

"No," said the nurse, sighing. "Only during the past couple of nights has it been nuts. The doctor will be able to tell you more. I've got to go." She hurried out of the room, leaving the three of them alone to wait.

Penny passed the time by sitting uncomfortably in a chair next to Leonard's bed and watching Sheldon pace back and forth, back and forth. She hated hospitals; she'd spent a week in one after her tonsils were removed, and the experience hadn't been a great one. She hated the dry air, tinted with the scent of latex and disinfectant, and the weary tension that poured out of every room. She hated that the chairs were never comfortable enough, that sleep always eluded her no matter how tired she was. She hated the food. But most of all, she hated hospitals because now her good friend was in one, and she was incredibly worried for him.

After nearly an hour of waiting, a doctor finally bustled into the room. She looked exhausted. "Hi, my name is Dr. Wisniewski," she said, sticking a hand out for Sheldon to shake. He kept his hands behind his back.

"Ok..." She retracted the hand. "So, how is Mr. Hofstadter doing?"

"He's asleep right now," Penny said. "When he's awake, he can barely talk to us, and he seems to be in a lot of pain. Do you have any idea what's wrong with him?"

"Penny," Sheldon began, holding a hand up to the doctor, "Not even the most advanced diagnostician would be able to discern Leonard's illness from the vague collection of symptoms he has displayed. There are hundreds of different diseases that Leonard may be suffering from."

"While that may be true," the doctor said, apparently too tired to let Sheldon rub her the wrong way, "We have been seeing these exact symptoms in nearly every patient that has been admitted over the past few days. And as I'm sure you noticed when you walked in, we have an alarming number of patients still waiting to be looked over. I'd be willing to bet that they all have the same symptoms."

"Are you saying that there is some sort of epidemic disease spreading through the community?" Sheldon asked.

"What I'm saying is that lots of people are sick, with presumably the same illness, but the illness doesn't seem to have a clear cause or cure. It's similar to the flu, but it doesn't respond to anti-virals, and antibiotics do not have an effect, ruling out bacteria. All we've been able to do so far is keep patients comfortable and hope that they recover on their own."

"And has anybody recovered?" Penny's voice was shaky, uncertain.

The doctor did not answer her, but the look on her face spoke volumes. "It's still early," she finally said. "Like I said, waiting is the only thing that can be done at this time. I will have blood samples taken from Mr. Hofstadter to make sure, but it is likely that he is suffering from the same thing as everyone else."

Penny and Sheldon exchanged glances. Could it really be possible that Sheldon had been right all this time? He looked as though he wanted very badly to speak, but Penny shook her head gently, and miraculously, he remained silent.

The doctor was speaking again; Penny only caught the tail end of her words. "...Need to put Mr. Hofstadter on pain medication and draw blood. Are you both family?"

"Close friends," Penny said. "His family is not from this area and we haven't been able to call his mother yet."

"Any and all phone networks appear to be down," Dr. Wisniewski replied, "so you most likely won't be able to. The Internet is down, too." She shook her head. "I don't know what the hell is going on here, but we'll do what we can for your friend. In the meantime, because you aren't family and it is past visiting hours, I'll need you to wait outside."

Penny stood up, thankful to be out of that awful chair but hesitant to leave Leonard's side. She kissed his forehead and then walked over to a protesting Sheldon.

"Come on," she urged, grabbing his arm and pulling. He reluctantly followed.

"Sheldon," Penny began as soon as they were out of the room, "We can't—"

"Everyone needs to know about this!" Sheldon exclaimed. "My theory was right! I mean, of course my theory was right, I am rarely wrong—"

"Shut up," she said, pinching the arm she was still holding. "If you start spouting crazy theories about aliens and poisoned food, you will get us kicked out of this hospital."

"They aren't crazy theories," he insisted.

"I know that." Penny's voice softened. "And you know that. But nobody else does. All it would do is freak people out. We need to keep this quiet for now, and be here for Leonard."

"There is one thing that puzzles me," Sheldon remarked, stopping in the hallway and turning to face her. "Leonard is sick, presumably from the Chinese he ate the night he returned from Las Vegas. Howard and Raj, however, appeared to be healthy and well when I saw them at Cal-Tech yesterday afternoon. Assuming they all shared their dishes at the restaurant, as they are wont to do when I am not around, it seems unlikely that only Leonard would be ill from the meal."

"Maybe he's eaten something else since then," Penny suggested. "You know, besides your food?"

"That's preposterous." Sheldon shook his head and resumed his walk toward the waiting room. "Leonard always adheres to instructions pertaining to my theories, even when he disagrees with them."

"I hope you're right," Penny said as she followed behind him. "I really, really hope you're right."

* * *

Several exhausting hours later, Dr. Wisniewski found them in the sea of waiting room chairs and told them the results of Leonard's blood test. Penny's insides wrenched as the doctor confirmed their fears: Leonard did have the mysterious disease that was plaguing so many people, and his prognosis was not good. Leonard was awake, however, and he wanted to speak with Sheldon. He glanced meaningfully at Penny before following the doctor down the hallway.

Penny dug desperately in her purse, pulled out a crushed pack of cigarettes, and hurried out of the waiting room and into the crisp night air. She hadn't smoked in years, but kept the pack in case a crisis arose and she needed something to calm her nerves and bring her back to herself. Lighting up and inhaling shakily, she leaned against the rough red bricks of the hospital and tried to stifle her tears.

Three years before, when she'd moved into the apartment across from Leonard and Sheldon, she hadn't given much thought to the role the two geeks would play in her life. She had, against her better judgment, ended up dating Leonard, which ultimately made a mess of their friendship. But she cared deeply for him and wanted the chance to fix things, wanted him in her life. What was she going to do if that chance was taken away from her?

She took a final drag from the cigarette and tossed it on the ground. The taste was making her nauseous, but her nerves were better. The air around her felt electric and uneasy, as though a storm was close by, but it never stormed in Pasadena. A lot of things never happened in Pasadena; she was never without friends. She was never really alone. She never let go of the things that mattered to her. Leonard mattered to her, and she didn't want to let go of him, not now.

"Penny?" Sheldon called her name gently from the open door, pulling her from her thoughts. He looked like hell, like he was trying too hard to hold too many things in. "Leonard wants to speak with you."

"Okay," she croaked, her voice scratchy from the cigarette. If Sheldon could smell the smoke on her when she walked past him, he had the decency to not bring it up.

The walk down the hallway seemed to take years. When she turned to stand in the doorway, Leonard smiled weakly at her. He had an oxygen tube trailing from his nose and an IV hooked to his arm.

"Hi," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Hi," she said brokenly. She leaned over him and took one of his hands in her own; his grip was weak, far too weak.

"Turns out Sheldon was right," Leonard mumbled. "What a bastard."

Penny laughed through her tears. "He is a bastard."

"I was so mad at him, and mad that he was spending time with you... I know that's stupid," Leonard admitted. "I knew he had to be wrong. I ate out for lunch every day. It was almost... sinful."

Guilt washed over Penny. "Leonard..."

"You don't have to say anything." He reached up to cup her cheek with his free hand. "It wouldn't have worked, Penny. I love you and you are the love of my life, but it wouldn't have worked. I know that."

Penny's tears fell in tiny drips to the bed. "I don't want to lose you, Leonard. I don't know what to do."

"You'll figure it out. You're the most confident person I know." He thumbed tears away from her cheek. "Take care of Sheldon. He doesn't think he needs anybody, but he needs you."

"I need you," Penny sobbed, tasting salt on her lips.

"You have me," he said simply. Then he closed his eyes and let out a soft groan. "Can you get me some water? I'm so thirsty..."

"Of course," Penny said, wiping the tears from her cheeks and turning around. The pitcher was on the other side of the room, and was empty. "I need to fill this up," she told him. He nodded weakly.

When she returned to the room, the monitors attached to Leonard were beeping crazily. Nurses rushed in and surrounded him, but Penny knew he was already gone.


	7. Chapter 7

Rain pelted the car windshield as Penny and Sheldon drove home. The silence between them was punctuated by the slippery swish of the windshield wipers and the occasional crack of thunder. There had been no reason for them to stay at the hospital; because they weren't family, they had no say in what happened to Leonard's body, and after an hour they were told by the nurses to go home and get some rest.

Penny was exhausted, both physically and emotionally, but she knew she wouldn't be able to sleep. As it was, she could barely drive. She was having difficulty accepting that only two hours earlier, Leonard had been alive and telling her those heartbreaking things, and that now he was gone. It was too unreal. Even after he'd gone and she'd walked up to see his motionless figure in the hospital bed, she'd found herself unable to accept the reality of the situation. He was just sleeping, right? Or maybe he was in a coma? It couldn't be possible that his heart had stopped and his brain had ceased forming the thoughts and ideas that made up Leonard Hofstadter. It couldn't be true...

A yelp from Sheldon dragged Penny from her thoughts and caused her to slam on her breaks; she'd nearly run a red light. The rain on the pavement reflected the color and took on the appearance of spilled blood.

"Sorry," she muttered, not looking at him. Sheldon said nothing in response.

The rain was still falling heavily from the sky when they reached the apartment complex. Sheldon hurried to the front door, but Penny took her time and let the cool rain wet her clothing and hair. If I stand in this long enough, she thought, maybe the rain will fill the emptiness inside of me.

When they reached the fourth floor, Penny decided to keep going. Sheldon turned, his key still in the lock, and watched her ascend. "Where are you going?"

"To the roof." She didn't stop.

"But... we are experiencing a thunderstorm." She assumed he was giving her a bewildered look, but she didn't turn around to find out. "It's dangerous!"

"I don't care."

She kept going, up and up and up, until she reached the rusty door separating her from the storm. She lit a cigarette before pressing her body against the door and letting the rain engulf her again.

She was surprised when Sheldon joined her a handful of minutes later, but she did her best not to show it. She re-lit her damp cigarette before taking a drag.

"My mother always used to smoke when she was distressed," Sheldon commented, noting her cigarette. "After a fight with my father, she'd go out into the garage and pull out the pack she had hidden behind her gardening tools. When I told her about the health risks one faces as a smoker, she responded: 'Shelly, everybody has their vices, and this is mine. When I'm madder than a hornet or so upset I want to cry until I don't have a grieving bone left in my body, I smoke one of these things and the world feels a little less hateful. So don't you dare chastise me.'"

"Your mom and I have a lot in common," Penny remarked as she exhaled smoke.

"You remind me of her sometimes," Sheldon said. Penny wasn't sure what to make of that.

"I guess I'm having a hard time believing that Leonard is really dead," Penny said quietly despite the roar of the rain in her ears. "It doesn't feel real."

Sheldon nodded. "According to the Kübler-Ross model, denial is the first stage of grief. It is strong, but ultimately transient. Neither you nor I were expecting Leonard to die; the surprise will dissipate, and we will move through the stages."

"I've never lost anyone before. I don't know what I'm supposed to do... how I'm supposed to feel. It feels like he's just downstairs, but I know he isn't. I'm so..." she sighed. "I feel so numb. Shouldn't I feel something?"

"Penny, it's a protective mechanism. I feel numb, too. But I've lost someone before... it passes." She looked at him and saw that he seemed to be very far away from her. She tried to picture him crying at someone's funeral, tried to imagine his heart wrenching at the thought of losing an important presence in his life. It wasn't as hard as she expected. Though he didn't often show it, Sheldon cared about the people in his life, and it wasn't a gigantic leap to think that he'd mourn their passing.

The sun was beginning to peek through the rain-filled clouds on the horizon. Penny tossed her soaked cigarette on the ground and stepped on it for good measure. "Let's go in."

* * *

Grief didn't settle over Penny until a clap of thunder awoke her from a comforting dream about her relationship with Leonard. She had been re-enacting one of their best days together; they'd gone for a picnic in the park, and Penny had sucked on chocolate-covered strawberries suggestively and playfully poked his cheek with a finger covered in mustard. He'd laughed and kissed her gently and told her about the different types of clouds in the sky. Cumulus, cirrus, stratus...

When she awoke in the dark and recollection replaced her warm thoughts, she started crying and couldn't stop. She felt guilty for ruining her friendship with Leonard; she regretted not seeing him more in the past few weeks, regardless of his wishes; she hated that he'd eaten out because he was angry with Sheldon, angry over the fact that she was spending time with Sheldon. What right did he have to be mad at her over that? What right did she have to be angry with a dead person? And why was she busy feeling sorry for herself instead of letting her grief be purely about Leonard's passing? What kind of person did that make her?

She felt miserable and lonely and suddenly wanted to get away from her apartment, away from everything. Barefoot with keys in hand, she blindly stumbled out of her bedroom and wrenched the front door open, unsure of where she was going but eager to get there nonetheless. When she walked into the hallway, she literally ran into Sheldon, nearly knocking both of them over.

"Penny?" Sheldon placed both of his hands on her arms, steadying her. "I was just about to—"

She tried to push him away, tried to make her way to the stairs. "I have to get out of here, I can't stay—" She choked on her tears. "I can't—"

"Penny..." The look of genuine concern on his face made her cry harder. She stopped struggling and fell into him, her shoulders slumping in defeat. She clenched the fabric of his shirt in tight fistfuls.

"This is all my fault," she sobbed into his shoulder. "Leonard is dead and it's all my fault."

Sheldon stood there awkwardly for a moment before slowly wrapping his arms around her. "Don't be ridiculous," he whispered into her hair, his voice taking on a tone Penny had never heard before. "There's nothing you could have done."

"But what if—"

"Shhh." He turned his head a little and his cheek was warm against Penny's temple. "If you need to cry, then cry. But don't blame yourself, or let your grief stem from the 'what if's. Leonard made his choices and you made yours, and it's pointless to consider alternatives when you only have access to one Universe."

She couldn't help it; a laugh made its way through her tears. He was right, of course, but couldn't he throw her a bone, just this once? "Just let me miss him, then," she murmured, her voice muffled against him.

"That is acceptable," he said. Then, in a small voice, "I miss him too."

Penny hugged him tighter to her and let the tears fall until there was nothing left.

* * *

"Um... are you guys... locked out?"

Penny opened her sore, dry eyes. She was in the hallway, wedged uncomfortably between the door frame and door of apartment 4A. Sheldon was next to her, still asleep, his arms around her.

She blinked blearily and realized that Howard and Raj were staring down at her with unreadable expressions on their faces. "What?"

"Locked out?" Howard looked equal parts amused and annoyed, if such a thing was possible. "What's going on?"

"Oh." Penny shook Sheldon gently and he awoke with a start. When he saw Raj and Howard, he awkwardly withdrew his arms and moved to stand.

"We... we have some bad news," Penny said solemnly, taking the hand offered by Sheldon and climbing to her feet. "Leonard's, he's... he passed away last night, at the hospital."

"Jesus," Howard said, clearly taken aback. Even Raj let out an audible gasp. "Was he—"

"It was due to the food contamination," Sheldon clarified. "He was eating out every day. Which explains why you are both intact and Leonard is, well, not."

Howard and Raj both looked like they needed to sit down. "Let's go in," Penny suggested, opening the door.

Once inside, Raj immediately went for the liquor cabinet and poured himself a shot. He took it and then another before making his way to the couch.

"Don't judge me, I'd just really like to be able to talk right now," he said defensively when he fell onto the couch.

"I just can't believe it," Howard said, his voice breaking slightly. Penny sat down next to him and gave him a gentle hug.

"Was... did he go... was he in any pain at all?" Raj asked finally.

"No, they gave him plenty of pain medication. He went peacefully." Penny realized she was crying again; she hadn't thought there were any tears left for her to shed.

After several long minutes filled with embraces and crying, Sheldon cleared his throat. "I don't mean to be insensitive, but what is our next step? People are dying, and we may be the only ones who know exactly why. We need to spread the word."

"It'll be hard to tell anyone anything when all communication mediums are out of commission," Howard pointed out, wiping at his eyes. "Phones are dead, Internet connections are down... personally, I'm surprised you guys still have—"

The lights in the apartment flickered and went out. "...Electricity," Howard finished. "Sorry, shouldn't have said anything."

"What the hell?" Penny got up and opened the blinds to let in light. "Why doesn't anything work?"

"I suspect the extra-terrestrials have found a way to disable all forms of communication besides face-to-face conversation," Sheldon said. "At least, that's what I would do in their situation— it will be difficult for people to organize any sort of retaliation when they cannot communicate over long distances."

"It'll also be tough if they're dead," Raj said grimly. "Have you guys been outside lately? The streets are empty. CalTech is deserted. People aren't bothering to go to work because their families are sick or dying."

They all sat in silence for a moment, trying to grasp the magnitude of the situation. They had no idea whether the rest of the world was affected, or even the rest of the country. They had no way to communicate with their families. A stab of fear ran through Penny when she thought of her parents. Were they OK? How could she know?

"Howard, is your mom all right?" Penny asked suddenly.

"Yeah... she has enough brisket stored away to feed a large Jewish family for the next two years, and possesses the digestive system of a carrion bird. It'll take more than a little tainted food to take her down."

"That's good." Penny looked over at Sheldon. "What about your mom, your grandmother? You can't call them and you have no idea if they're all right. Same goes for my family."

Sheldon's eyebrows knitted together in worry. "I hadn't thought of that. I don't know what I'd do if Meemaw..." He swallowed. "But we have an obligation to pass on our knowledge, first and foremost."

"Well..." Howard gestured toward Raj. "We were thinking about driving to Washington DC. Sounds kind of crazy, I know, but what else are we going to do? And if there's anybody who needs to have a good idea of what's going on, it's the Department of Defense... if they don't know already. Regardless, maybe they'd appreciate free consultation from two geniuses."

"You have a Master's degree in Engineering and Raj spends his nights staring at the sky and avoiding women because he can't talk to them," Sheldon said derisively. "But you do have a point. Along the way, we could stop by the spacecraft and see if anything has changed."

"I have an idea," Penny interjected. "Why don't Sheldon and I take a detour to check on our families, while you guys go straight to DC? We can just meet up with you somewhere... like, maybe outside of the White House, in a week. It won't take longer than that to drive to Nebraska, then to Texas, and then to DC, will it?"

"Assuming we drive non-stop and do not spend a longer than a day or so at either destination, no," Sheldon agreed. "Although the Pentagon would be a more suitable meeting place."

"Sounds good to me," Raj said. Howard nodded.

"What do you say, Sheldon?" Penny asked, her eyes searching his. The unspoken fact was that they would save time if they split up; it was the sensible thing to do. In fact, Penny wasn't even sure what use she'd be in DC, seeing as how she wasn't a genius and although she knew the pentagon was both a shape and a building, she had no idea how many sides it had. But after going through so much, she didn't want to be alone, didn't want to be separated from Sheldon. The idea of spending days in a vehicle with him was awful, but the idea of doing it alone was even worse.

To her surprise, Sheldon smiled. "Sounds like a plan." To Howard and Raj, he said: "We'll meet you in front of the Pentagon at 2200 hours, exactly five days from today. Penny and I will drive by the spacecraft and take notes, then make our way to her hometown. From there, we will travel south, to my hometown. Then we will be on our way to DC." He stood. "I need to pack and write up an itinerary for the trip. Penny, please be ready to leave in an hour."

She gaped at him. "An hour? Come on, Sheldon. Two hours at least. It's been a rough... night, day, whatever."

He sniffed. "Fine, two hours." He nodded toward Howard and Raj. "Good luck, gentlemen. We will see you in seven days."

"Likewise," Howard said. "What if... what if you guys don't make it in time? Or something?"

"Then we'll find you," Sheldon said simply.

Penny hugged Howard and Raj tightly, and then thought of something. "Oh! I have something for you. Don't go anywhere, I'll be right back." She ran across the hall quickly. When she returned, she had a double barrel shotgun under each arm, and a box of slugs in each hand. She handed one box to Howard and one gun to Raj, who took the items hesitantly. "You never know when you'll need to go all Nebraska on someone's ass."

"Good lord!" Sheldon yelped, pointing at the guns. "Why do you have those? Do you even have a permit?"

"Sheldon, sweetie, where I'm from, a girl doesn't go anywhere without a gun. And you can't tell me that you grew up in Texas and never went shooting."

"Of course not; I'm an excellent shot, actually," Sheldon retorted. "But that's not the point!"

"Well, Howard's a good Jewish momma's boy who's never shot a gun before in his life, and I'm a Hindu, which requires no further explanation," Raj said. "But... thanks. Hopefully we won't have to figure out how to use it."

Penny set down the other box of slugs and took her gun in hand. "Let me show you. You've just gotta load the slugs here, and—"

"Like this?"

"Yeah. Then you click off the safety—"

"If any of you ends up getting shot, I am not cleaning up the mess," Sheldon muttered as he walked to his room to begin packing.


	8. Chapter 8

_A couple of notes before I let you get to this chapter... _

_- Thanks to everyone who has stuck it out so far and is still reading; I guess I'm doing something right! This is my first BBT fic and I really had no idea where I was going to take it at first. I love the Sheldon/Penny dynamic and I wanted to see what would happen if I put them in crazy situations together. I hope I'm striking a decent balance between serious moments, angst, and humor. (I like to think that in a tough situation, Penny and Sheldon cope by picking on each other, at least initially.) _

_- The other fandom I've written for is the X-Files... that should tell you something about the direction in which I am taking this fic. ;) _

_I thought I had more to say, but I guess that's it for now! Happy reading! And, of course, reviews are a great incentive for me to keep writing!_

_

* * *

_Exactly two hours later, Penny and Sheldon began their journey. They had decided to take Leonard's car, citing the full gas tank (Penny's observation) and its recent trip to the mechanic for servicing (Sheldon's observation). Penny felt out of place behind the wheel of a car that wasn't her own and was unnerved by the presence of Leonard everywhere; dairy-free snack wrappers, physics notes scribbled and tossed about absent-mindedly, and even the positioning of the driver's seat reminded her of him. She rolled down the window and tossed a few things out.

"That's littering!" Sheldon exclaimed.

"Yeah, well, maybe the aliens won't take over the planet if we trash it up a bit," she responded coolly.

"We should be throwing out one of the many unneeded items you packed," Sheldon observed, gesturing behind him to the pile of bags in the back seat. "We're traveling cross-country, not going on a luxury cruise."

Penny took her eyes off the road for a moment to glare at him. "Who knows when and if we'll make it back to Pasadena? I didn't want to leave anything that I'd miss."

Before heading out, Penny had looked around her apartment one last time and thought about how things had changed so quickly. Leonard was gone, the majority of Pasadena was dead or dying, and she was going on a road trip with Sheldon, of all people. She'd gone on an impromptu road trip before, but it had been right after graduation, and she'd traveled with a couple of crazy friends. The trip had ended up being fun as hell; unfortunately, she didn't suspect she'd be having a repeat experience with Sheldon.

"Penny, you are driving awfully fast," Sheldon said nervously, eying the speedometer. "Our chances of being killed in a head-on collision increase with every extra mile per hour."

Penny rolled her eyes. "Do you see any cars for me to collide with? We're on I-15 and I have yet to see anybody else on the road. I could crank this baby up to 100 and we'd be all right."

"Unless you lose control of the car and we smash into the median," Sheldon pointed out.

"Well, when it's your turn to drive, you can go just as slow as you damn well please," Penny muttered through gritted teeth. It had only been an hour and she was already gripping the steering wheel too tightly in frustration.

Sheldon's eyes widened. "What do you mean, drive? I can't drive!"

"Oh, yes you can," Penny said. "I can't drive for days on end. We'll switch off every eight hours or so until we get somewhere."

"Fine, but if my hands slip on the wheel and the car hits something and crumples like an aluminum can, I'm blaming you."

They continued driving in silence. After a while, Penny glanced over and realized that Sheldon had fallen asleep, road map still in hand. It wasn't until then that she noticed the dark circles under his eyes and the hollowed out appearance of his cheeks. She felt a brief pang of guilt run through her for being so annoyed with him; he'd been through just as much as she in the past couple of days, and had probably slept less. She'd come completely unhinged in front of him the night before, and he'd been there for her, despite his general discomfort regarding emotional situations. And she'd seen his haggard expression when he'd come from Leonard's hospital room to fetch her. What had they talked about? She tried to imagine what Leonard's last words to Sheldon would be, but it was too sad to think about.

Removing one hand from the steering wheel, Penny reached out and briefly clasped Sheldon's fingers with her own before kicking the car up to the next gear and letting the adrenaline rush drive her forward.

* * *

The sun was hanging low in the sky when Penny nudged Sheldon a few hours later to wake him up. "Hey, I just passed Vegas. We're almost to the space thingy."

Sheldon rubbed his eyes. "Already? How long have I been sleeping?"

"Just a few hours." She moved her head from side to side in an effort to pop her neck. "You didn't miss much. I still haven't seen anybody else on the road besides us. I didn't see much point in driving through Vegas, so I just went around." She held up the road map she'd pilfered from Sheldon's lap. "If we stay on this road, we should pass right by the space thingy... hopefully we won't be too far away from it to see anything."

"Or too close," Sheldon said. "If the extra-terrestrials have vacated their spacecraft, we should do our best to not draw their attention. I'd hate to be vaporized by advanced weaponry only moments after being the first human being to visually observe an alien species."

A few minutes later, something large and ominous appeared on the horizon. It seemed to be burning in the bright glare of the setting sun.

"Is that it?" Penny asked, pointing. Sheldon whipped out a pair of binoculars and looked in the direction of her finger.

"Yes," Sheldon confirmed. His voice was almost quivering with excitement.

As they drove closer, the craft's appearance became more defined and its reflective surface more blinding. Penny was overwhelmed by its size; seeing it on television hadn't done it justice. It was bigger than anything she had ever seen. Despite still being miles away, the craft filled the expanse of sky visible from the car.

"Jesus," Penny breathed.

"I don't think Jesus had anything to do with the creation of that craft." Sheldon's retort was condescending, but Penny could hear a note of reverence in his voice.

"What are those little dots surrounding it?" Penny asked, squinting to see. Sheldon seemed to hesitate for a moment before responding.

"People." He glanced at her over the top of his binoculars. "They do not appear to be alive."

"Let me see." She took the binoculars from Sheldon and peered through, keeping one hand on the wheel of the car. He was right; they were people, and they weren't moving. Hundreds of people in fact, dressed in camouflage and slumped over in a neat line. "They must've been the soldiers assigned to guard the perimeter," Penny guessed.

"That was my assumption." Sheldon jotted something down in a notebook. "The extra-terrestrials do not appear to have exited their craft, however. May I have my binoculars back?" He reached out to retrieve them.

"Hold on a second," Penny said, swatting away his hands. She looked out again. "I think... it looks like something is moving."

"I didn't see anything," Sheldon said carefully. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah... yeah." The glare of the spacecraft itself was making it difficult to discern details, but something very... alien... was definitely making its way down the line of dead soldiers. It didn't seem to have arms, legs, eyes or anything familiar; it was just _something_, and it was moving so fluidly and gracefully that Penny knew it had to be something alive. She shuddered involuntarily.

"Here," she said, handing the binoculars back to Sheldon. He looked through them eagerly.

"You're right! It's very... well..."

"Creepy?" Penny said, shuddering again.

"Not exactly the word I was going for, but all right," Sheldon conceded. "Being human unfortunately biases our imaginations. We expect extra-terrestrials to appear humanoid or to at least have human characteristics, but I can hardly think of an adjective to describe the being I am currently observing. It is certainly not humanoid."

"It's freaking me out," Penny muttered. "I think we should probably—"

She was interrupted by a sudden burst of light from the direction of the ship, followed by the car lurching violently. Penny slammed on the brakes and struggled to get the vehicle under control.

"What the hell was that?" She had to yell to be heard over the engine, which was making a very loud clanging noise.

"I believe we've taken a hit!" Sheldon yelled back, his voice laced with panic. "We need to take evasive action!"

"Are you planning on shooting at them with my gun?" She cried. "That's pretty redneck, even for me! And I doubt it'd do any damage from this distance!"

"Evasive action means avoiding another hit like that and getting the hell out of here!" Sheldon bellowed. "I'd suggest speeding up!"

Penny floored the gas pedal and prayed the engine wouldn't die on her. Thankfully, the car continued chugging along. They were passing the ship now, and Penny could make out details on the hull. They were far too close.

When another flash of light filled the windshield, Penny slammed on the breaks again. Something bright and fast zoomed by, shaking the car slightly as it passed.

Penny moved her foot to the accelerator. "Why are they shooting at us? Two people in a car aren't a threat!"

"They may want to capture us. Either way, if they disable this car, we're in trouble." He looked through the binoculars. "There's more of them now. They're swarming over the bodies..." Sheldon let the binoculars fall to his lap and gave Penny a look. "Gun it, please."

Penny was more than happy to oblige.

* * *

"I believe we have put sufficient distance between ourselves and the spacecraft," Sheldon said after they'd driven a handful of miles. "It has been fifteen minutes since they last fired their weapons. We seem to be safe."

Breathing a sigh of relief, Penny brought the car to a stop in the middle of the road.

"What are you doing?" Sheldon asked, looking puzzled.

Penny ran both of her hands through her hair and looked at him. "Sheldon, we were just attacked by aliens. They were SHOOTING at us. I need a minute to recover."

"Would you like me to drive?" Sheldon offered.

"Yeah, actually, that would be great." Penny threw the car door open and climbed out. On her way to the passenger side, she assessed the damage; smoke was billowing out from the hood of the car, and the front grill was smashed in. The license plate had been completely blown off.

"I don't know how much farther this car can go," she said to Sheldon, who had joined her near the front of the vehicle. "I'm not very knowledgeable about this sort of thing, but I'm pretty sure smoke is a bad sign."

"No, this certainly does not look good," he mumbled, eyeballing the hood.

Penny shrugged and continued walking to the other side of the car. "Well, we can always get another car once this one dies on us."

"Get another car? From where?"

"Well, you know... we'll borrow one. From somebody." She raised her eyebrows when she said the word 'borrow', in an effort to emphasize its real meaning.

Sheldon looked scandalized. "Are you insinuating that we should steal? What is this, _Grand Theft Auto_? Penny, I do not steal cars!"

"Come on, Sheldon," she urged. "Have you looked around lately? There's not a ton of people around to enforce laws. Survival of the fittest, you know? We've gotta take what we need to survive."

That did the trick. Sheldon considered for a long moment, and then nodded. "I suppose you're right. Survival of the fittest."

"Good!" Penny slapped the hood of the car. "Let's hit the road, then. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it."

"Please try to limit your use of transport-related idioms," Sheldon said as he sat down behind the wheel of the car and began the long process of adjusting the seat and mirrors. "The thought of driving for eight hours straight already makes me feel nauseated."

"Okay," Penny sighed. "But... are you sure you don't want just one more, for the _road_?"

"Penny..."

"You know, sometimes you really _drive_ me up the wall," she said.

"..."

"I'm sorry, am I interrupting your _train_ of thought?"

"PENNY!" His face was twitching.

She smiled slightly and settled in for the long ride ahead.


	9. Chapter 9

Leonard's car only made it a few hours before sputtering weakly and rolling to a stop in the city limits of an anonymous town in Utah. Throwing on a light jacket, Penny stepped out into the brisk evening air and headed for the nearest large parking lot on foot. Sheldon locked the car doors and reluctantly followed.

"How exactly do you plan on driving a car with no keys?" Sheldon asked as they wandered around the parking lot of a Wal-Mart Supercenter and tried the doors of cars that looked old enough to lack a security system. "I do not know how to hot-wire a car."

"I'm hoping we'll get lucky," Penny responded as she searched under the floor mat of a Ford. "I keep a spare key hidden in my car for emergencies. I also always leave my car unlocked, because who would want to steal that junky old thing?" She shut the door of the Ford and tried the door of the car next to it; it swung open easily. "But in this case, I'll take any car that runs over one that doesn't."

"I see." Sheldon looked around nervously, as though he expected the car's owner to accost them at any second. "It is very strange that we have not seen a single person enter or exit this Wal-Mart."

"Maybe they're all dead," Penny said bluntly as she moved on to the next car.

"An interesting thought. That those infected would be able to make it here before dying suggests that the ailment brought on by the contaminated food affects different people in different ways, and at different speeds. Perhaps the extra-terrestrials lack an intimate understanding of the human body's immune response, and as a result were unable to control the exact effects of the disease."

"Uh-huh," Penny mumbled, only half listening. She'd risked trying a nicer car and was surprised to find it unlocked. She was even more surprised when she found an extra key shoved underneath the plastic lining of the hood. Bingo!

She waved the key in front of Sheldon's face triumphantly before climbing behind the wheel. "Come on, Moonpie; let's go before somebody charges us with a felony."

"I am officially a criminal," Sheldon moaned as he fastened his seat belt.

* * *

The bulk of the drive was blissfully uneventful. They spoke little; Penny was worried about what they would find when they reached her hometown, and Sheldon spent most his time either writing furiously in his notebook or sleeping. An hour after passing the Colorado state line, Penny dozed off and nearly sent the car sailing past the shoulder and into a cornfield. Sheldon insisted on driving after that, and Penny did not argue with him.

"Are you hungry?" Penny asked Sheldon as she unbuckled her seat belt and twisted to reach the seat behind her. "I'm starving. Where's the bag with the food?"

"The rations are in the emergency survival kit, which is the black duffel bag." They hit a pothole in the road and Penny's arm bumped roughly against Sheldon's. "Please hurry up and put your seat belt back on."

"Okay, okay." She unzipped one of Sheldon's bags and quickly realized it was the wrong bag; it contained clothes, a couple of comic books, toiletries... and a small wooden box. Penny had seen that box before; it was where Sheldon kept his letters from his grandmother. Penny's heart tumbled painfully in her chest, but she said nothing and carefully zipped the bag back up.

"Did you find it?" Sheldon asked. Their arms touched again.

Penny blinked rapidly and unzipped the correct bag. "Yeah... yeah." After grabbing a couple of dense plastic-wrapped bars labeled 'rations' in Sheldon's bold print, she sat back and glanced at Sheldon's profile. She wanted to say something comforting, wanted to hug him or let him know that she was there for him... but the words fell flat on her lips when he met her gaze.

"Want one?" She quickly offered up a ration bar.

Sheldon gave her an odd look but reached over to take the bar from her. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," She said quietly as she chewed on the bland chunk of granola and stared out the window at the endless expanse of dark sky.

* * *

Penny slept fitfully as they made their way across Colorado. Twice she awoke in a panic, unsure of where she was or where they were going; a glance at Sheldon would bring the memories flooding back and cause her stomach to clench in worry. Her dreams were haunted with the faces of her parents, her brother and sister, and Leonard. Sometimes they looked happy; other times they seemed lifeless, empty.

When Penny opened her eyes for the third time, she was greeted by the weak light of a morning sunrise. "Where are we?" she asked, yawning and stretching in her seat.

"We just passed the Nebraska state line," Sheldon told her. "Did you sleep well?"

"Not really," she said, trying to ignore the knots that were forming in her gut. They were in the home stretch; Omaha was only about eight hours away. She reached out and patted Sheldon's forearm. "Let me drive the rest, so you can sleep."

"All right, but I would appreciate it if you stayed on the road this time," he commented as he brought the car to a stop. They switched seats and Penny immediately hit the accelerator, putting the car on cruise control once she reached the right speed.

The miles standing between Penny and Omaha dragged on as she drove. She did her best not to think about her family, or Leonard, or the aliens. Instead, she thought about the mixed bag of memories Nebraska roused within her; summers spent playing baseball with the neighborhood boys and her father, weekends wasted shearing sheep and milking cows in the barn, cheering at homecoming and losing her virginity behind the bleachers as a sophomore. It was strange to be going home, regardless of the circumstances. When she'd decided once and for all to get the hell out of Dodge and move to LA, it hadn't been on the best terms; her father had watched her go with a hard look on his face, and her mother had cried in the living room. Her trip with Sheldon was the first she'd made since moving. Assuming her parents were alive, she wasn't even sure what she would say to them. Their phone conversations were curt, and she could always hear the disapproving tone in her father's voice. The thought of facing him after three long years made her stomach turn almost as much as the idea that something had happened to him.

Penny's level of anxiety increased with every town she passed. When she finally turned onto the gravel road leading to her childhood home, she had to swallow the bile making its way up her throat.

The bump and jostle of the car on gravel woke Sheldon from a nap. "Are we there yet?" he asked as he rubbed his eyes. Penny nodded queasily in response.

"I think I'm gonna throw up," Penny moaned. She stopped the car in front of the house and took a few deep breaths. "Sheldon, what if they're not... what if—"

"Would you like for me to go in first?" Sheldon offered.

His kindness waded through Penny's sea of nausea and gave her some strength. "No, but I do want you to come with me." She opened the car door and put a shaky foot on the chalky ground.

The house looked shabbier than it had three years before. The paint was peeling from the window shutters and the front porch was littered with the dead saffron leaves of a drooping maple tree. The bright afternoon sun was tempered by a cool autumn breeze that stirred the unkempt grass curling around Penny's ankles. She forced herself to walk toward the front door, to move faster than she wanted. Sheldon stayed at her side, matching her stride for stride.

Penny still had her key; she could easily unlock the door and walk in. Instead, she knocked three times and waited, the wooden planks of the porch creaking in protest as she shifted her weight. She felt Sheldon's eyes on her but let herself stare at the faded front door until her vision went out of focus.

Finally, miraculously, Penny's father opened the door. His face had more lines than Penny remembered, and he had a raw look in his eyes that she didn't recognize. But he was there, he was alive, and he was, thankfully, loosening the grip on the rifle he had in his right hand.

"Thank God," Penny breathed before flinging the screen door open and throwing her arms around her father. He stiffly patted her on the back with his free hand.

"What are you doing here?" He asked when Penny loosened her grip. His voice gravelly and low.

"I'm, well, I came to make sure you guys were ok," Penny said, trying to shake off the wobbly timbre of her voice. She was so relieved to see him that she could barely stand. Leaning against the screen door for support, she continued. "None of our phones work, and most of Pasadena is dead or dying. I had to come."

"Well, your mother will be happy. She's been worried sick about you and your sister, and it's been three weeks since we last heard from Marissa. Which is still more than we've heard from you," He muttered. The accusation slipped through Penny's relief and stung like a slap in the face.

"Dad, I'm sorry. I've been so—"

"Who's this?" Penny's father interrupted her and gestured toward Sheldon. Penny had almost forgotten that he was standing next to her.

"Oh, this is— this is Sheldon. He lives across the hall from me."

"Boyfriend?"

"No!" both Penny and Sheldon answered at once. "We're just traveling together," Penny clarified . "He has family in Texas, and we're going there next."

"So you won't be home long." It wasn't a question. Penny could feel guilt sinking its teeth into her heart.

"We know why people are dying and need to relay the information to the United States government," Sheldon explained quickly. "After a short trip to Texas, we will be driving to Washington DC to contact the Department of Defense and meet up with our friends."

"You haven't been eating anything other than what you grow here on the farm, have you?" Penny asked, her eyes wide. To her surprise, her father started laughing.

"Is this boy crazy?" He asked Penny, pointing at Sheldon. "And you know I never eat anything I haven't grown myself. Same goes for your mother. Are you trying to tell me the food's been poisoned, or something?"

"Yes, exactly," Penny said. "We'll explain it all to you and Mom. Where is she?"

Penny's father moved to the side to let Penny and Sheldon enter. After tearfully hugging her mother and taking a seat on the ratty living room couch, Penny began to tell her father and mother about everything that had happened in the past couple of days. Sheldon took over whenever she wasn't sure what to say, or when something was too hard to discuss. Once the story was complete, Penny sat back against the couch and waited for them to react.

"You've cooked up an awfully fantastic story," Penny's father admitted after a moment. "So much so that I can't think of any reason why you'd go through all of that effort to lie. So I suppose I believe you."

"You think I'd lie about my friend dying?" Penny asked, trying to control the anger rising in her breast.

"No, I don't. Which is why I believe you."

"Do you really have to leave so soon, though?" Penny's mother asked, her eyes pleading. "It's been so long since we've seen you."

"Mom..." Penny felt terrible. On one hand, she knew they needed to stay on track; on the other, she was beginning to wonder if she could justify following Sheldon to DC when it was obvious her parents needed her here.

Much to Penny's surprise, Sheldon piped in. "We can at least stay the night," he offered.

"Oh, wonderful!" Penny's mother climbed to her feet; she was moving much more slowly than in the past. "I'll make dinner. What do you say to chicken and dumplings?"

"Sounds excellent," Sheldon responded. Penny's mother disappeared into the kitchen, humming something as she went. Penny's father looked out at her from under furrowed eyebrows before rising and walking out the front door.

"Sheldon, we don't have to stay," Penny started. "We've got a lot of ground to cover in the next—"

"Nonsense." The corners of Sheldon's mouth twitched upward in a smile. "We can spare an evening. I'll go help your mother with the cooking."

Penny waited until he left the room to laugh incredulously. Was this really happening? The entire world was falling apart, and she was in Nebraska, with Sheldon? Who was cooking dinner with her mother?

Shaking her head, Penny closed her eyes and tried to clear the image of her father's accusing glare from her mind before following Sheldon to the kitchen.

* * *

_Another chapter down! This section is kicking my butt, mostly because I want to skip ahead and write a scene that's coming up... let me know what you think!_

_EDIT: Hi guys! Thank you for all of your comments! I wanted to let you know that it may take a little longer than usual for me to get the next chapter up; two of my good friends are getting married and I am involved with that until Saturday night! I have 1300 words done for Ch 10, but I really don't want to toss up a short chapter, so... I'll see you guys at the end of the weekend!  
_


	10. Chapter 10

During dinner, Penny found herself seated between her father and Sheldon at the cramped kitchen table. The silence was suffocating; she had no idea what to say that would be appropriate both for her parents and for the brainiac she'd brought with her. Sheldon had astonished her before dinner with his ability to listen endlessly as her mother discussed this or that with him, only stopping her once or twice to gently correct her grammar. She'd never seen him yield so easily to someone whose IQ was clearly inferior to his own; Hell, he wasn't even this patient with other geniuses. She couldn't decide if his attitude toward her mother was indicative of some sort of personal growth, or whether it was a survival mechanism he'd developed growing up under his mother's roof. Sometimes it was just easier to nod and smile and not put up a fight.

Penny picked at her food and glanced at her father. He was eating purposefully and seemed to be looking at everything but the three other people at the table. Penny could tell that he was torn between being relieved to see her and being angry over the walls that had sprung up between them. There was a time when she could tell her father anything and everything, but she had betrayed him by leaving the farm. Her mother was more understanding and more willing to forgive and forget with just a hint of guilt-tripping tossed into the mix, but her father... he couldn't let go of her absence, couldn't accept that her abandonment had been an effort to find herself and not an attempt to hurt him.

Thankfully, the silence made everyone eat faster, and Penny was soon carrying empty plates from the table to the sink. She let her mother show Sheldon to the spare bedroom while she hand-washed the dishes.

"He seems like a nice boy," her mother remarked when she returned to the kitchen.

"Sometimes." Penny scrubbed at a stubborn chunk of food stuck to the bottom of a pan. "He's a lot nicer than he used to be."

"Your friend who passed away, he's the one you dated for a while?"

Penny stopped scrubbing. "Yeah. He and Sheldon were roommates."

Penny's mother placed a comforting hand on her daughter's shoulder. "I'm sorry, honey. It must have been hard."

"It's still hard," Penny admitted as she resumed scouring the dirty pan. Her mother began drying the dishes she'd already cleaned. "I miss him a lot."

They worked in silence for a few beats before Penny's mother changed the topic. "Your dad's still pretty mad about you leaving."

"I know he is." More scrubbing. "I've apologized a million times, but it doesn't seem to make much of a difference."

"You know how he is," her mother said. "He'll take a grudge to his grave, even if it involves his own daughter. It doesn't mean that he doesn't love you... you just cut him deep when you left."

Penny sighed, having had this conversation with her mother more than once. "You know why I had to go. It may not have been the best choice I've ever made, but I had to find out for myself what else was out there."

"And what did you find?" Penny's mother turned to face her. "A couple of smart friends? Penny, the world is going to hell in a hand basket and you're still following the next big thing. Did you ever think that you're needed here? That maybe it's time for your family to be the most important thing in your life?"

Penny balled her hands into fists under the surface of the soapy water. "Mom, don't do this to me. Please. I'm tired and the past few days have been really, really hard. I don't need the extra guilt."

Penny's mother softened a little. "I'm sorry. I just don't want to lose you. I appreciate having my family around me when there's a crisis, and I can't figure out why you don't feel the same way."

Penny wanted to tell her mother that Sheldon and the guys were her family now, that she hadn't felt loved and wanted by her parents since her sister got married and made babies like she was supposed to, while Penny remained adrift in the easy irresponsibility afforded to her by her youth. But because there was a part of her that still wanted her mother and father's love, she kept her mouth shut and cleaned the dishes.

After finishing up, she stomped to the bathroom and ran a shower so hot her skin was raw and pink when she stepped out nearly a half hour later.

* * *

Penny barely had time to toss on a robe before Sheldon knocked on her door. "What's up?" she asked, hoping her eyes weren't puffy from the crying she'd done in the shower.

"I wanted to inform you that we need to leave at 0600 hours tomorrow morning if we are to stay on schedule. I would like to make it home by early evening and leave for DC by noon on the following day."

"Sheldon..." Sighing, Penny flopped down on her bed. "I don't know if I should go with you."

He looked puzzled. "Why not? Given your past interest in my relationship with my Meemaw, I assumed that you wanted to meet her."

"Oh, no, I would definitely like to meet her," Penny said. "It's just that... I don't think my parents want me to go. And to be honest, I don't know if I have any business going with you to DC. I'll just be in the way."

"I see." Sheldon was still standing in the doorway, his body silhouetted by the bright lights in the hallway. "Well, I understand if that is your decision."

Penny sat up a little to glare at him. "That's not what you're supposed to say! You're supposed to say, 'Penny, don't let your parents get to you, they've been playing this game your entire life and you don't owe them anything.' Or maybe, 'It doesn't matter what use you'll be in DC, I want you to go.'"

Sheldon stared at her for a beat, and then said, "It doesn't matter what use you'll be in DC, I want you to go."

"Exactly!" It took a moment for the words to sink in. "Wait. What?"

"What?" Sheldon echoed.

"You want me to go? Really?"

"Penny," Sheldon began, his voice taking on the exasperated tone he adopted when she wasn't getting something he'd already explained twice, "I assumed it was clear that I value you as a traveling companion and as a friend. My best friend, in fact, now that Leonard has passed. I would not have gone on this trip with anyone else, and while you infuriate me at times, I generally enjoy your company. That is more than I can say for most people." Having finished, he took a deep breath and exhaled noisily.

Penny was speechless. She'd certainly noticed that the friendship between herself and Sheldon had been changing since the weird night on the couch, but she assumed it was outside of Sheldon's emotional realm to understand it and repeat to her the same things she felt but hadn't put into words. Apparently, she hadn't been giving him enough credit.

Crawling out of the bed, Penny closed the distance between them and hugged Sheldon warmly. His hands fluttered against her back hesitantly before settling.

"You're my best friend, too," she mumbled. "Thank you."

"For what?" His words hummed against the top of her head.

"For giving me a good reason to go." Penny pulled away and gave him a small smile before turning. "I'll see you in the morning," she said as she climbed under the covers of her bed.

"Yes. Ok. Good night," he murmured. He looked so confused that Penny almost failed to stifle her laughter until he left the room. Although he had more going on in terms of emotions than she'd expected, he still had a long way to go.

* * *

The next morning, Penny met Sheldon at the bottom of the stairs with her bags in hand. "You're two minutes late," Sheldon complained, tapping his watch. Penny rolled her eyes and walked past, looking for her parents. She found them waiting for her in the living room.

"So you're going." Penny's dad was standing next to the couch, hands clasped behind his back.

"Yeah." She set down her bags and hugged her mother first, kissing her cheek gently before straightening and eying her father. "I know you're pretty mad at me. I'm sorry for leaving the way I did the first time." She hugged him, but he did not hug her back. "I'm sorry I have to go now. But I promise, once all of this is over, I'll come back and we can work things out. You're my dad and I miss the way things used to be."

She felt his shoulders sag at her words. "Go on, then," he whispered, and she let him go.

Penny mumbled a quick "bye" before grabbing her bags and hurrying to the door. She could hear Sheldon saying goodbye behind her, but she didn't stop to wait for him. When he joined her in the car a minute later, she was wiping at the tears in her eyes.

"Let's go," she said as she put the car in drive and ignored Sheldon's questioning glance.

* * *

_I apologize for the short chapter, but I wanted to give you guys something! I was part of a wedding party and out of town for a few days, so this is all I've managed to pull together in between catching up on sleep, working, and editing 420+ pictures! I'm not entirely happy with how this section has turned out, but I wasn't sure how to flesh it out and I have more ideas in mind for the rest of the story, so I figured short and sweet was probably the way to go. We finally get to discover the fate of Sheldon's family in the next chapter! _


	11. Chapter 11

As the miles stretched on, Penny found ways to distract herself from thoughts of her father. She watched the scenery fly by and tried to enjoy the brilliant shades of red, yellow and orange brought on by autumn, played the elements game with Sheldon (and lost four times in a row), and sang along with the CDs she found stuffed under the passenger side seat after Sheldon took over the driving duties.

"It's bad enough that you are subjecting me to this awful racket," Sheldon complained over the wailing guitars of Penny's favorite Guns n' Roses song. "Please don't sing along."

"I'll just turn up the music so that you can't hear me," Penny chirped as she cranked the volume. Sheldon grumbled something about forgetting to pack a pair of earplugs but didn't protest.

Once the song ended, Penny turned the volume down and continued flipping through the CD booklet. "Whoever owned this car was trapped in the late 80s and early 90s, music-wise... Rush, Aerosmith, Weezer, Soundgarden, Stone Temple Pilots, Green Day..." She looked up at Sheldon, amused. "You don't know any of these guys, do you?"

Sheldon sniffed. "Popular music consists of repetitive chord progressions and unimaginative lyrics. I have no interest in it."

"What DO you like, then?"

"Beethoven, Mozart, Tchaikovsky. Occasionally Chopin if I'm in the mood. And a handful of broadway showtunes." He cast a sideways glance in her direction. "I bet you don't know anything by those musicians."

"Hey, I know Beethoven!" She crossed her arms. "And I was in _Rent_ that one time. All I'm saying is, it can't hurt to broaden your musical horizons a little. Pop music wouldn't be popular unless it was doing something right."

"If the goal of popular music is to appeal to the simple ears of the general populace, then it certainly is doing its job," Sheldon said. "I personally have higher standards for the sounds that are interpreted by my temporal lobe."

"Whatever," Penny muttered as she put in an unmarked CD. The first track was quiet and haunting with a gentle voice wrapped around the melody. "I don't know this song," Penny admitted as she listened. The lyrics were a sad reflection on the death of a loved one.

"It just occurred to me that popular music may no longer have an audience," Sheldon said, his voice a solemn tone over the undercurrent of music.

"Yeah..." Penny changed the track. The next song was just as wistful. "In the end, there may not be anyone left to make music."

"Oh, there will be. The problem is that most of the humans that survive will be concerned with procreating in an effort to maintain the species. There will be very few of us interested in preserving knowledge, and even fewer that have the time to devote to being creative. We are not a species that adapts well in the face of a major threat."

"I'm sure it won't be as bad as all that," Penny said optimistically. "The world is a pretty big place. There's no way these aliens can wipe us out to the point that we lose everything and have to start over."

"You'd be surprised by how easy it would be," Sheldon said quietly. "And the Earth is incomprehensibly tiny in comparison to the Universe."

Penny frowned. It was too much to think about, too hard to fathom. "Let's try a new CD," she suggested. "What do you say to some ELO?"

* * *

Sheldon hit the breaks a little too hard when he drove up to a small cottage well off the beaten path. "We're here."

The house was painted a pale yellow and dotted around the perimeter with colorful flowers. A single redbud tree reached out with naked branches from the well-maintained front yard. The only thing that kept the scene from being perfectly picturesque was a gigantic garage looming a handful of feet away that was nearly twice the length and width of the cottage.

"What the heck is that?" Penny asked, pointing.

"My Pappy drove commercial freight rigs for a living. When he died, my Meemaw sold his garage but refused to move. Which explains the strange juxtaposition."

"Gotcha." Penny noticed that Sheldon's hands were shaking as he moved to take off his seat belt. "Are you ok?"

He didn't look at her. "Let's just go in."

When they reached the front door, Penny half-expected Sheldon to knock three times and call for his Meemaw, but the door opened a crack before he could rap his knuckles against it. A weathered, bespectacled face peered at them myopically.

"Who's there?" The older woman asked. Her voice sounded as eroded as her face looked. "Do I know you?"

"Meemaw, it's me," Sheldon said patiently. "It's Sheldon."

"Oh! Moonpie!" The door swung open, and the woman enveloped Sheldon in a warm hug. To Penny's surprise, he hugged her back without hesitation. "What in heaven's name are you doin' here?" She asked once she released her grip on him.

"I— we— came to check on you. I was worried that you wouldn't follow my directions."

"Oh, honey, you know I always listen to everything you say!" Sheldon's grandmother exclaimed. "Please, come in. Who have you brought along?"

"This is Penny. A good friend," he added. It was still strange for Penny to hear him say it.

"Oh! A girl?" Sheldon's grandmother patted him knowingly on the arm. "I knew someday you'd find a girl. I always told you that everybody needs somebody, even a genius boy like you."

"Meemaw, I'm not a boy, I'm a grown man," Sheldon whined in a tone that suggested the contrary, "and she's not... my girl. She is my neighbor."

"Any girl that has the patience to put up with you and ain't your mother or me is probably yours for the keepin'," Sheldon's grandmother said with a wink. Penny pretended she didn't notice the blush making its way across Sheldon's cheeks.

"I'm really happy to finally meet you," Penny said, extending a hand to the tiny form in front of her. "Sheldon has told me a lot about you."

"That's not entirely true," Sheldon pointed out. "You breached my privacy and read my letters from her, and then refused to do what I asked unless I disclosed information."

Penny waved a hand in front of his face. "Whatever. He only said nice things," she said to the other woman, smiling.

"Well, that's because my Moonpie don't have a bad thing at all to say about his Meemaw!" Penny had never met someone with so much energy, and the woman had to be almost four times her age. "I'll make some tea. You like tea, right, Penny?"

"Absolutely," Penny responded, but Sheldon's grandmother had already left the room. Penny patted Sheldon on the back. "I'm so glad your grandmother is ok. She's awesome!"

"Yes, well," Sheldon started, closing the door they'd left ajar when they entered, "I called her the day the extra-terrestrials landed and warned her to stock up on food and use the rations I'd left for her when the food ran out. She does, however, have a forgetful streak, so I was somewhat worried she wouldn't heed my instructions."

"I'm not sure the bad food would have taken her out, anyway," Penny commented. When she sat down on the couch, she noticed two shotguns propped in the corner of the room, near the door. "I see both of our families like to greet visitors with a gun in the face."

Sheldon took a seat next to her. "When I was 7, a local hoodlum tried to rob my Meemaw in the middle of the night. She shot him in the foot with his own gun, tied him to a tree, and called the police. Ever since, she's kept a couple of guns in her room and by the front door, just in case."

"Wow," Penny murmured in awe.

"Tea's ready!" came a voice from the kitchen.

Sheldon rose. "No beverages in the living room," he explained before heading in the direction of the voice.

The tea was delicious, and whatever Sheldon's grandmother was cooking on the stove smelled great. "What are you making?" Penny asked before sipping her tea.

"Gumbo," Sheldon's grandmother said, beaming. "The best in the state. Won three county fairs and the state fair twice. You'll love it."

"Have you heard anything from my mother or my sister?" Sheldon asked suddenly. Sheldon's grandmother stopped stirring the gumbo.

"Your mom's just fine," she said, "and Missy is all right, last I heard. But it's been a week or so. They listened to you, just as I did, and haven't been eatin' anything new. In fact, most of the people you called came by and told me how grateful they are that you warned them ahead of time. Seems like a good chunk of Texas will make it through, at least."

Penny fought to keep her jaw from dropping. Sheldon had called people, and they'd listened to him? The crazy guy who probably drove them all nuts as a kid? She couldn't believe it.

"Why don't you bring in your things from the car?" Sheldon's grandmother was saying. "Penny can keep me company while I cook."

Sheldon nodded and took to the task without argument.

"I'm impressed," Penny remarked after he left the room. "Trying to get him to do something for me is like pulling teeth."

"Now, I'm sure that's not entirely true," Sheldon's grandmother said with a grin. "You wouldn't be here if he wasn't being at least a tiny bit accomodatin'. Speaking of, why _are_ you here?"

"I'm from Nebraska, so we decided to stop there first," she explained. "We're going to DC after this to meet up with our friends."

"I see. Anyway, it's good to meet you. He's mentioned you over the phone before."

"Oh really? What did he say?"

"I think he referred to you as 'the obnoxious female across the hall'. Never by name, mind you. Somethin' must have changed if you two are buddies now."

"I guess so," Penny mumbled. She sat in silence for a moment and watched Sheldon's grandmother stir the boiling gumbo slowly. "So... what was Sheldon like as a kid? Was he ever... you know... normal?"

"Who's to say what's normal? He was just as fascinated by the world around him as any other kid... difference is that he took to science like a fish to water, and found these interestin' ways to learn how things work. His daddy hated that he wouldn't play in the dirt like every other little boy, but he was a sonuvabitch who never showed Sheldon any love at all, so it's his loss." Her words were bitter. "Sorry for swearin'."

"Sheldon doesn't talk about his dad much," Penny said.

"He barely knew the man, thank the good Lord. He had his mother and me, and that was enough." Sheldon's grandmother turned to face Penny. "Why you askin' me about Shelly's childhood? Why don't you ask him?"

Penny had to think for a minute before answering. "He'll only tell me about the things he _did_ as a kid, and that doesn't say a lot about the kind of person he was, or is. I guess I'm just wondering how he could grow up here and be so... different."

"He ain't that different, trust me. He's smart and he thinks he don't need the things that everybody else needs, but he's wrong. He'll catch on someday."

Penny was deep in thought when Sheldon re-entered the kitchen. "Penny, stop asking questions about my childhood," Sheldon said briefly before sitting down.

"How could you hear that?" Penny asked in astonishment.

"Vulcan hearing." His eyes gleamed playfully over the rim of his tea cup.

"Quiet, you," Sheldon's grandmother said, swatting at him. "Tell you what: we'll make it even. What were you like as a kid, Penny?"

* * *

Halfway through dinner, Penny realized that, for the first time in what felt like decades, she was having fun. The conversation between herself and the others at the table was lively, and Penny soon discovered that Sheldon's grandmother was definitely not afraid to press her grandson's buttons and was more than willing to ask him delightfully embarrassing questions. She had an interesting story to go with every memory and a laugh that shook her entire body and brought tears to her eyes. Penny loved talking to her and wondered if her own grandmother had been as much fun during life.

After the table was cleared and the dishes were clean, Sheldon's grandmother announced that she was going to sleep. "My bones can't handle staying up past 8 o' clock," she explained before hugging Sheldon and Penny in turn. "Good night, you two. Be good and don't wake me up; Sheldon knows what I'm like if somebody gets me up in the middle of the night."

"A mistake I only made once," Sheldon said to Penny as his grandmother made her way up the steps to her room. "We should probably go to sleep, as well."

"Not so fast," Penny said with a cheeky grin. She darted to her room, grabbed something out of her bag, and brought it with her to the kitchen. A look of horror crossed Sheldon's face when he saw what she was holding.

"Penny! My Meemaw definitely does not allow alcohol in the house!"

"Then we'll drink it outside," she said, heading for the back door. "And anyway, I saw a bottle of brandy tucked away in the corner cabinet."

"That is for cooking!" Sheldon exclaimed. Penny snorted and held the door open for him. He reluctantly followed her. "And you said 'we'. I do not drink. You know that."

"I've seen you inebriated before," she said, enjoying the feel of the fancy word as it slipped through her lips. "More than once, actually."

"I took off my pants!" he cried.

"Well, if it happens again, I won't be offended." Penny watched the innuendo sail over Sheldon's head before sitting down on the stoop. "Come on, Sheldon. One drink won't hurt us. Our families are alive and we're alive. That's worth celebrating, right?"

"You and I participate in different celebratory activities," Sheldon countered. He was still standing in the doorway, stiff as a board.

Penny patted the concrete next to her. "Sheldon, if you don't sit down right now and have a drink with me, I will pour tequila all over the kitchen table and go wake up your Meemaw. I imagine she'd be super pissed if I told her you did it."

The threat was a little weak, but it seemed to do the trick. Sheldon took a seat, glared at her, and took the first swig from the bottle, germs and all. Penny immediately wished she had a camera to record the twisted grimace he made in response to the taste.

Penny took a long draw from the bottle, hissed, and put the lid back on. "Not so bad, huh?"

"I hate you," he choked.

* * *

_I am super mean for ending this chapter the way I did. :D And, yes, I'm playing the booze card again. I might as well get all of the cliché BBT fanfic scenarios out of my system in one fic!  
_


	12. Chapter 12

_Seriously guys, I don't even know. I had no plans to write and post two chapters today (I actually had a million other things I SHOULD have been doing), but it happened. This particular chapter has been bouncing around in my head for weeks, so I just had to get it out of my system. Work and GRE studying are going to consume me very soon, so expect a brief hiatus while I deal with the real world for a while. But, never fear! There's still much of this story to tell. :)_

_Also: There's a couple of fun references in this chapter that maybe you'll catch. Keep an eye out for 'em!_

_Finally: I made it to 10k hits on this story today! You guys rock my socks!  
_

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* * *

_

The world was just beginning to fuzz up and cloud over when Sheldon snagged the bottle from Penny's hands and took another drink.

"I thought you didn't drink!" She exclaimed, stiff-arming him and making a tiny dribble of tequila escape from his mouth. She reached out without thinking and wiped it away with a finger.

"I don't," he said simply after he swallowed. "I've decided that my brief foray into this particular celebratory activity does not count."

"Bullshit," Penny said. "You like it. Being buzzed is fun, admit it."

"There is a certain dulling of the senses that is rather pleasurable," Sheldon admitted. "But I'm not particularly fond of losing the ability to form coherent thoughts."

"Sometimes it's nice to not form any coherent thoughts," Penny pointed out before taking another swig.

"I suppose for some."

More drinking. Sheldon certainly wasn't keeping up with Penny, but every once in a while, she'd be talking and he'd sneak the bottle from her grasp and take a quick nip. She felt a little guilty about it, almost like she was enabling an underage kid to get drunk or something. But Sheldon wasn't a kid... he was _Sheldon_. And his cheeks were flushed with the warmth of the alcohol, his eyes a little too bright.

"I want to show you something," he said after climbing to his feet. He extended a hand to Penny.

"Where are we going?" She asked, taking the hand and pulling herself up. Yup, the tequila was definitely kicking in.

"You'll see."

Sheldon led her to the huge garage next to the house. He felt around on the top ledge of the door frame, found a key, and inserted it into the lock. "Since this thing doesn't belong to your grandmother anymore, isn't this technically considered breaking and entering?" Penny asked as she followed him inside.

"Just add it to my list of recent criminal wrongdoings," Sheldon quipped. He began climbing a tall ladder positioned next to the door, and made an impatient noise when he realized Penny wasn't following him.

"You want me to climb up there after drinking almost a third of a handle of tequila?"

"Oh, come now Penny, surely you've engaged in far more... physically rigorous activities following alcohol consumption."

Penny raised her eyebrows in response, but he had already turned to continue climbing. "Maybe," she admitted as she put a foot on the first rung, "But none of them really required a good sense of balance."

The ladder went all the way to the ceiling. "I thought you were afraid of heights?" Penny said shakily as she clung to the ladder. "I think I'm a little afraid of heights."

"I am afraid of falling, which is a completely different phenomenon. And I know for a fact that this ladder is sturdy, as I have climbed it dozens of times. Thus, my fear of falling in this particular scenario has been eradicated by past experience."

"You're telling me that you've convinced yourself not to be afraid just because you've done this before? What if you slip and fall?"

"The scientific method functions on the premise that any theory stands up as long as it has not been disproven. I have not slipped before; thus, it is not likely that I will do so this time. Possible, of course, but not likely."

Penny was trying to work through Sheldon's weird reasoning when he reached the ceiling and popped open a hatch above him. He pulled himself up and then reached out his hand again for Penny to take. She gasped when she finally joined him on the roof; she could see nothing but stars in every direction.

"The roof of this garage provides an excellent view of the night sky," Sheldon explained.

"No kidding," Penny breathed. She leaned back against the angled shingles of the roof and cast her gaze upward.

"You wanted to hear a story about my childhood? Here is one," Sheldon began, settling in next to her. He was close enough that Penny could feel the warmth of his thigh next to hers. "When my parents were fighting and my sister was being intolerable, I would call my Meemaw and she would bring me over to her house for days at a time. At night, I would sit on this roof with my Pappy's binoculars and track the phases of the moon as well as the movements of the planets along the ecliptic. I memorized every constellation and observed the galaxies and stars within them." He looked up. "I have not encountered many things in my life that have made me feel inferior, but the night sky is one of those things. The size of the Universe is unfathomable to the human mind. Nothing else has ever made me feel so limited by my abilities as a human being."

Penny glanced over at Sheldon and took in the emotions that were dancing across his features. It was then that she realized she had been completely wrong about him. He wasn't emotionally stunted; he simply had so much invested in science that there seemed to be nothing left for anything else. His passion for physics was like her own passion for acting, or a photographer's passion for taking pictures, but taken to a completely different level. It was all-encompassing, soul-devouring. It was everything.

Her second realization, which came immediately on the heels of the first, was that she very badly wanted to kiss him. Considering the first revelation, the second didn't seem to make much sense, but he was just sitting there next to her, close enough for her count the eyelashes casting shadows over his gleaming eyes and saying things he'd never said before, probably to anyone. His sudden vulnerability, on top of everything else, drew her in and plucked at her heartstrings in gentle pizzicato. When he finally looked over at her and saw the way she was staring at him, she felt her insides do a tremulous somersault. Oh God, what do I do? She wondered in a panic. This is the part where the guy is supposed to lean in for the kiss, but this is _Sheldon_, I'm pretty sure he's never kissed anybody but his mother... IS he leaning in, or am I imagining things? Oh God, he is, I can't believe I've been seduced by the nerdy science talk of Dr. Sheldon Cooper—

"Penny, are you all right?" Sheldon was asking. "You do not appear to be well."

"What?" She blinked and the moment was over. Sheldon was watching her worriedly, not swooping in to kiss her. How ridiculous could she be? "I'm fine," she finally managed.

"Good." Sheldon closed his eyes. "I'm sorry if my story bored you."

"No, of course not!" Penny rolled over onto her side to face him. "I like it when you tell me stories." The phrase came out more breathy than Penny would have liked.

Sheldon gave her a little smile. "I'm glad you're here with me, Penny."

Penny's heart turned in her chest. "Me too," she whispered as she rested her head against his shoulder and stared at the sky.

* * *

When Penny finally climbed into bed a handful of hours later, she found herself unable to sleep. Her head was spinning both from the tequila and with thoughts of Sheldon. Was she crazy for thinking that maybe there was something between them? Clearly his first and only love was science, but she'd forced her way into his world and he'd certainly made efforts to accommodate her. He'd admitted that she was his best friend, and he had stopped flinching at her touch. Could that possibly translate to something else? Would he even know what to do with her affection? The little thrill that had run through her on the roof was certainly not foreign to her; she recognized it for what it was and could trace its development through the trials and tribulations they'd experienced together. It was weird, so weird, but there nonetheless. Penny had felt the switch before, the moment when a friend became something else entirely, and she'd always acted on it in the past, but now...

What was she thinking? What was she waiting for?

"Screw it," she mumbled aloud as she threw off the covers and marched to Sheldon's room. She knocked once, twice, but no one answered. Then she noticed the light leaking out from underneath the bathroom door, and waited.

When he opened the door, toothbrush in hand, Penny took two steps toward him and kissed him before she could lose her resolve. She tasted the residual toothpaste on his lips. The kiss was dry and awkward and Sheldon seemed afraid to move anything, lips included. When Penny pulled away a handful of seconds later, the look on Sheldon's face was a strange mix of terror and confusion.

Penny could feel the color rising in her cheeks. She didn't know what to say or where to look; she could feel Sheldon's eyes on her, but the last thing she wanted to do was meet his gaze. Instead, she turned abruptly and padded across the hall to her room.

"Oh my God," she moaned once she was alone. She buried herself underneath the blankets of the bed and tried to forget about what had just happened. She'd kissed Sheldon and it hadn't gone well at all! Again, what the _hell_ was she thinking? She would never forgive herself if she managed to ruin another friendship with her poor choices. How would she ever face him again?

"Penny," called a soft voice from above the blankets. Penny felt a painful jab of fear run through her. Was he really so socially handicapped that he thought it was a good idea to confront her after that? And why hadn't he knocked?

Penny slowly pulled back the blankets and peered out at him. He still seemed a little confused, but at least the deer in headlights look was gone. "Look, I'm really, really sorry about... that," she mumbled. "I was— I had to— I thought that maybe—"

Any and all words slipped away from Penny when Sheldon pressed his lips to hers. The second kiss was less awkward, once Penny got a grip on herself and began kissing back. She was suddenly reminded of her first make-out session in the back of a Ford; the guy she'd been with (whatever his name was) was the high school heartthrob and she had never even let a guy touch her before, much less kiss her. She'd had to pick up on what she needed to do as she went, which was exactly what Sheldon was doing with her. There was something incredibly endearing about him leaning down at an odd angle and trying something that was way outside of his normal realm of experience.

Penny reached out and pulled him down toward her, onto the bed. She slipped a hand up under his nightshirt and felt him shiver in response. He wasn't touching her with his hands and it was driving her crazy.

"It's ok for you to touch me, you know," Penny said breathlessly when their lips parted.

"I don't have any idea what I'm doing," Sheldon admitted. His tone was quiet but not sheepish; he wasn't embarrassed, just unsure. "I don't know if this is ok."

"Why wouldn't it be?" Penny asked. She was running her hands up and down his slender frame and enjoying the way he had to close his eyes to concentrate on speaking.

"I don't know if this is just... just an evolutionary response to a threat to the species, or if I really..." He swallowed. "I don't normally feel things for people, Penny. But I feel something for _you_, and I don't know why."

Penny's insides did another little tumble. "Not everything can be categorized and easily referenced in that fantastic brain of yours." She trailed a finger down the length of his arm. "Just go with it." She let her hand slide lower to prove her point.

Sheldon groaned and nuzzled against her neck. "You are incorrigible," he whispered into her ear. The words set thousands of tiny nerve endings aflame and twisted the world in a thousand directions at once.

Everybody needs somebody, Penny thought as Sheldon kissed her again and finally let his long fingers make contact with her smooth skin.

* * *

Penny awoke far later than she was supposed to the next morning with a splitting headache and no clothes to speak of. Sheldon had long vacated the room, as the side of the bed he'd slept on was cold. In fact, she had no idea if he'd stuck around at all after... that. She couldn't seem to bring herself to put a word to what had happened. Ultimately, it had been somewhat disappointing to discover that Sheldon was, like all men, capable of being swayed by a little physical coercing. At first he'd firmly refused to engage in 'coitus', an awful word laced with clinical coldness; he'd said it would be 'irresponsible' of them. But Penny had managed to convince him after a while that it was a Very Good Idea for them to have sex. Sex, oh man, I had sex with Sheldon, she finally admitted to herself. I had sex with Sheldon and I liked it. Not that things went off without a hitch; he fumbled and did a lot of apologizing (since when did Sheldon apologize for anything?) and it was all over far sooner than she wanted it to be. And now that she thought about it, she was pretty sure he'd scrambled out of the bed immediately after and thrown himself in the shower. But it had been nice to be so close to him, to know that she could get a rise out of him, and vice-versa. He'd managed to free up some of his passion for her, and it had felt good to be wanted.

What now? She wondered as she tossed on her robe and checked her appearance in the mirror. She looked tousled and unkempt. Great, I even look like I spent part of my night having sex, she thought. Sex with Sheldon. Oh, Jesus. She tied her hair up in a haphazard bun and wandered out of her room and into the kitchen.

"Good mornin'!" Sheldon's grandmother greeted her brightly. She was cooking a full breakfast with eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast. The smell was making Penny feel vaguely nauseated.

"Where's Sheldon?" She asked, immediately cursing her voice for being so gritty.

"Takin' a second shower," Sheldon's grandmother replied. "It's very strange... I heard the water kick on very early this mornin', and he's in there again. I can't imagine why." She gave Penny a wink.

Shit, she knows, Penny thought in horror. How could she know? Where's the nearest gun so I can shoot myself? "Me either," she mumbled weakly.

When Sheldon joined them in the kitchen ten minutes later, he sat down next to Penny at the table and glanced at her without turning his head. "Good morning, Penny," he said with perfect politeness. "Good morning, Meemaw."

"Hi," Penny croaked. She thought about his hot breath against her ear and nearly had to excuse herself from the table. Get a hold of yourself, she reprimanded. It's not like this is the first time you've—

"...leave soon, so you may want to get ready," Sheldon was saying.

"Leave?" Penny asked dumbly.

"Yes, leave. Soon. We're running very late," Sheldon reminded her. "I would suggest a shower." His level of calm was maddening.

Of course you would suggest a shower, Penny thought sourly before standing up. Probably seven of them, after last night. "Sounds good. Give me twenty minutes."

"You have to stay for breakfast!" Sheldon's grandmother protested. "I never get to cook for anyone these days."

"Fine, we'll leave after breakfast," Sheldon agreed.

"Fine," Penny said.

She stood there for a moment and glared at the back of Sheldon's head before leaving the room. The water in Texas had better be hotter than the water in Nebraska, she thought to herself as she slammed the bathroom door shut behind her.


	13. Chapter 13

They were saying their goodbyes when Sheldon's grandmother leaned in close to Penny and whispered, "Take care of him, won't you?" Penny only gave a tight-lipped smile in response, but in her head, she was wondering why the hell everybody suddenly seemed to think it was a good idea to task her with Sheldon's well-being. He had done as well as could be expected before she came along, and regardless of the crazy thoughts that had run through her head the night before, she wasn't disillusioned enough to really believe that he needed her. He was a grown man with two PhDs and he would probably ultimately be happier if somebody stuck him in a cave by himself with a whiteboard and an Internet connection.

In fact, she admitted to herself uneasily as she climbed into the passenger side seat, it was more likely that she would end up needing _him_, and that by sleeping with him she'd put something in motion that couldn't be easily stopped or put back in its proper place. Sure, they argued constantly and he was too skinny and completely in another Universe most of the time, but she often caught glimpses of the brilliance hiding underneath the obnoxious exterior, and she could see the little space where she fit into it all. And he'd said that he wanted her: Sheldon Cooper, the man who put himself above the earthly desires of the flesh, had _wanted_ her, had given in to her. It was exhilarating and frightening, like she'd managed to pull a fast one on the person holding all of the cards.

"I think we should talk about what happened last night," Penny said after they'd been driving in relative silence for a couple of hours.

"Are you referring to the coitus?" Sheldon asked point-blank. Penny made a face. "I apologize. Intercourse?" Another face. "Sex?"

"Better," she said, still wincing. "But yeah... that."

"What about it?"

Oh, good Lord, was he going to make her spell it out? "Well, I mean... that's never happened before. Between you and me," she clarified lamely.

"No, it hasn't," Sheldon agreed. "I hope you are not worried that I did not find the experience pleasurable. I will admit that many of my initial reservations regarding physical contact and intercourse stemmed from my observations of other men and their inability to separate sex from the rest of their lives, but so far I have not been—"

"Sheldon, shut up," Penny interrupted. "What I'm trying to say is... did it mean anything to you?" It wasn't exactly the way she'd wanted to phrase it, but it was out in the open, anyway.

"Mean anything? Please be more specific."

Penny resisted the urge to reach over and throttle him. "Do you have feelings for me?"

Sheldon considered for a moment. "I informed you of how I felt last night, at least to the extent that I am able to comprehend." He slowed down a little (ok, a lot) so he could look at her without fear of driving off of the road. "Penny, for all of my gifts, I am not blessed with a high level of social awareness. I took a sudden interest in a carnal activity and you seemed receptive to it. I cannot tell you why; I can only tell you that the experience was completely foreign to me, but not altogether unwelcome. I put the words to it that seemed appropriate at the time."

Penny blinked through the speech. "So you do," was all she could think to say.

"For someone who very recently informed me that not everything is capable of being easily categorized, you seem very eager to put a name to and file away something I have accepted as a nebulous physio-emotional experience," Sheldon berated. "Please try to remember that the normal order of things has been recently upset, and that we have been thrown mostly against our will into unfamiliar situations. Things are bound to change."

Sheldon? Okay with change? This was new. But she couldn't disagree with him. "I know, I'm sorry. I guess there's no reason to really try and figure it out. Human curiosity, I guess."

Sheldon raised his eyebrows in a way that suggested he found the thought processes of humans to be whimsical and largely unnecessary. Maybe he really was a Martian. A Martian who had been in Penny's bed last night, but that was neither here nor there.

* * *

It was late at night when Penny noticed that the car's fuel level was dangling precariously below the E. Sheldon was asleep, so she pulled into the nearest gas station and popped open the tank. It had become common practice for her to break into the lone station of a sleepy southwestern town, figure out the buttons she needed to press in order to give herself permission to fuel up, and proceed to steal as much gas as her tank could handle. Sometimes, the gas station would be open with no one around; other times, she could swipe a credit card and somehow manage to get it authorized. But more often than not it was necessary for her to take a baseball bat (conveniently found at their first stop) to a window and let herself in.

"Maybe this one will be unlocked," she said to no one in particular. Sheldon's eyelids fluttered but he did not stir. She grabbed a flash light, stretched, and made her way to the door. When it swung open easily, she sighed in relief and leaned her bat against the building before going inside.

A horrendous smell immediately assaulted her nostrils. "Jesus!" she whispered, pulling her shirt up over her mouth and shining the flash light's beam around the interior. As she rounded the counter, she noticed a lumpy form hunched over on the floor, near the register. The smell was definitely stronger behind the counter; when she pointed her flash light at the rumpled mass, she gasped and came to the sickening realization that it was a man. By the smell, he'd been dead for a couple of days at the least; his skin was gray and lifeless, his eyes clouded over. Penny had seen dead people before, of course; she'd watched Leonard go cold in his bed, and she'd seen family members preened and blushed in nondescript coffins. But she'd never really seen the process of death, smelled it, recoiled in horror at the bloated features and dead eyes. With a shaky hand, she reached over the body, pressed two buttons, and backpedaled away from the body as quickly as she could.

When she returned to car, Sheldon was already filling up the tank. She walked slowly to the other side of the car and leaned heavily against the door.

"There's a dead guy in there," Penny said quietly. She heard the brief rustle of clothing as Sheldon turned to face her. "Really dead. He... it smelled awful."

"Honestly, I'm surprised we haven't run into a corpse before now," Sheldon said, uttering the word 'corpse' like it was nothing new to him, nothing to be afraid of.

Penny couldn't shake the image of the dead man from her mind. She thought about how lonely his death must have been, what his last thoughts were, whether he had a family at home that was worried about him. They're probably dead, too, she thought sadly. Everybody's dead.

"Penny?" Sheldon was next to her now, watching her. When she finally looked up at him, there were tears in her eyes.

"Everybody's dead," she murmured aloud. Her voice sounded strange to her, like it was coming from a point far in the distance. "Everybody's dead, except us and our families and our friends. Most of our friends," she corrected with a soft sob. "Why are we the lucky ones?"

The cool touch of Sheldon's hands cupping her cheeks made her jump. He was staring at her with a look of hard determination. "Penny, it has nothing to do with luck. I planned well and my family had enough sense to listen to me; you and Howard and Raj listened to me; your family lives a low-risk life. Darwin coined a term for it long ago."

"If it wasn't for you," Penny said softly, "I'd be dead, I know it."

"Well, you aren't dead, for which I'm sure you are thankful." A smile twitched against his lips. "I am certainly thankful."

Penny thought about all of the things that had happened to bring her to this point in time, where she was standing with Sheldon in an empty nameless town with so many questions and worries weighing on her mind. She refused to believe that evolution was completely responsible; that answer was too elegant, too simple. There was something else, something she couldn't name but could feel coursing through her veins; maybe it was the same something Sheldon felt when he looked up at the night sky, but she wouldn't dare mention the comparison to him. Instead, she wiped at her eyes, smiled, and kissed him gently before wrapping a hand around the handle of the car door.

"Let's get out of here," she said.

* * *

The final leg of the drive was almost unbearable for Penny. She was sick of driving and her entire body ached simply from being in the same position for so long. Sheldon never complained (Sheldon? Not complaining? Yet another impressive change!), but she imagined he was just as frustrated and exhausted. When they finally drove past signs welcoming them to the District of Columbia, Penny was filled with a mixture of relief and worry.

"Aren't we pretty early?" She asked, struggling to do the math in her head. "Like... by almost two days?"

"Yes, that is correct," Sheldon confirmed. "In fact, I had assumed that we would arrive early, but wanted to give us extra time in case complications arose."

"Great," Penny muttered. If she'd known that, she would have suggested that they stop somewhere and split up the long drive to D.C. She still probably would have ended up sleeping in the damn car, but at least there wouldn't have been any bumps in the road to wake her. "So, now what? Do we just drive up to the Pentagon and knock on the door?"

"I doubt we will have to knock. If Wolowitz and Koothrappali's journey was successful, then it is likely that we are expected."

As Sheldon predicted, they had barely parked in the visitor lot of the Pentagon when two black-suited men exited the building and began walking toward them.

"Is that— _no way_— is that Howard and Raj?" Penny asked incredulously.

Sheldon nodded. "I believe so."

"Greetings, Earthlings," Howard said with a broad grin. In addition to their well-tailored suits, both men wore sunglasses and matching ties decorated with little green alien heads.

"Where the hell did you find those suits?" Penny had to admit that they looked pretty good, sans the ties.

"Government issue," Raj said, smiling. "They also gave me these sweet anxiety pills that aren't on the market. No side effects, and I can chat up the hot G-women!"

Sheldon scoffed. "You both look ridiculous."

"Nice to see you too, Sheldon," Howard muttered. He whipped off his sunglasses and held out an arm to Penny. "Come with me, fair lady; there is much to discuss, and we don't have much time before..."

Penny decided to throw him a bone by taking his offered arm. "Before what?"

"Before we attack."

* * *

_Hooray, a new chapter! Let me know what you think! (Updates should occur pretty regularly from now on; I'm done with the damn GRE and I have part of my life back!)_


	14. Chapter 14

"When we first showed up, there wasn't a soul in sight; Raj and I had to get a little creative and break in," Howard explained as he led the group through the halls of the Pentagon. The fluorescent lights flickered weakly above their heads; Penny assumed the entire building was somehow running on back-up generators.

"You broke into the Pentagon?" Sheldon interjected. "I assumed the security was sub-par, but even so..."

"A general lack of electrical power tends to take out a lot of important security measures," Howard pointed out. "Anyway, after an hour or so of poking around, we ran into these two guys in the basement that nearly shot us. Once we explained who we were, though, they loosened up and said they could use our help. Just like that." Howard smirked. "That's how cool we are — didn't even require a security check."

"Whatever, dude. You almost peed yourself when they pointed those guns at us."

"Regardless," Howard said, ignoring Raj, "We were briefed on the current situation. Apparently, any and all attempts to communicate with the aliens have been pretty fruitless. They've got some impressive firepower and have wiped out every on-foot strike force sent to Nevada so far."

"That's not surprising, considering the shit they tossed in our direction when we drove by a few days ago," Penny said grimly. "We were almost a done deal."

"What about heavily armored vehicles? Are they able to withstand the weaponry of the extra-terrestrials?" Sheldon asked.

"There are a few tanks around that can take a handful of hits before going down, but that's about it. Aerial attack seems to be the best bet right now, as the aliens' overhead range is pretty limited, and we have the option of dropping bombs from a safe distance away. Nobody knows if it'll have any effect, but the plan is to try it out tomorrow morning."

"I guess it's a good thing we showed up early," Penny said.

Howard shrugged. "Sheldon told us before leaving that you guys would probably get here a couple of days early, barring any unforeseen circumstances." He seemed to hesitate before speaking again. "By the way... how's your family?"

"They're all right, thank God," Penny said. "And Sheldon's grandmother is alive, too. It was... it was a good trip," she finished, deciding it was probably a good idea to leave out the hairy details.

"Certainly an enlightening journey," Sheldon added. Penny jabbed him in the ribs to keep him from saying anything else, which earned her a strange look from Raj; she chose to ignore him.

"That's... good to hear..." Howard stopped in front of a large metal door, tapped a couple of numbers into a keypad, and stepped back as the door slid open. "Pretty sweet, huh? Just like Star Trek!" he said before entering.

Inside the room, several men in military garb were huddled around one end of a long conference table. They didn't look up when Howard and company entered the room.

"Who are they?" Penny asked quietly, leaning toward Raj.

"A couple of military strategists and the Air Chief Marshall of the Royal Air Force," Raj explained. "Most of the US military is dead, and the first country with the cajones to come across the ocean and figure out what was going on was England. The rest of the world has fared better than the United States in terms of survival."

"That's good to know," Penny said. "Have you been able to contact your parents?"

"Not yet," Raj murmured. Penny patted his arm comfortingly when she saw the worried look in his eyes.

"Ah! There you are!" came an exuberant voice from across the room. A tall man with bright eyes and a warm smile came over to greet them. "I see your friends have arrived."

"Yes," Howard said, gesturing toward Sheldon. "This is—"

"Dr. Sheldon Cooper, theoretical physicist," Sheldon interrupted.

"Excellent to meet you." The man turned to Penny. "And you are...?"

"Um, my name is Penny," she mumbled, unsure of what to say. "I'm, uh... well..."

"She is a sharpshooter," Sheldon said suddenly. Penny glanced up at him in surprise.

"And she's a good friend," Howard said, throwing an arm around her shoulder. Penny smiled in spite of herself.

The man clapped his hands together eagerly. "The more the merrier! We can certainly use another skilled set of hands." He held out his own hand to Penny. "Air Chief Marshal Sir James Lloyd, at your service."

Penny couldn't decide whether the man was actually charming, or whether his accent was simply helping his case. "Very nice to meet you," she said politely.

"I assume Dr. Wolowitz and Dr. Koothrappali have informed both of you of the current situation?"

"Yes, they have, although Wolowitz only has a master's degree," Sheldon answered, earning a glare from Howard. "I do have one question. What will happen if the aerial weaponry you plan on testing is ineffective?"

"In the event that our weapons fail against the aliens, it will be my responsibility to evacuate as many people as possible from this country," the Air Chief Marshal responded. "There is a strong chance that one of the countries possessing nuclear weapons will set their sights on the alien spacecraft. This is not something that anyone has much control over; the rest of the world is frightened by what has happened to the United States, and a handful of nations are willing to do whatever is necessary to protect themselves from a similar fate."

"So, basically, it's just a matter of time before somebody nukes us?" Penny asked.

"Our attack plan is holding them at bay for the time being, but if we fail tomorrow, there is a good chance that one or more countries will crack and hit Nevada with everything they have."

"But, what about our families? There still people alive out there."

"As I said, I will do my very best to evacuate as many people as possible," the Air Chief Marshal reiterated. "But there won't be much time. I can guarantee nothing." He flashed Penny an encouraging smile. "But I have the utmost confidence that we will succeed. We are bringing with us the heaviest artillery in existence, short of nuclear weaponry; I will be very surprised if the aliens do not fall swiftly tomorrow."

Penny nodded in response to the Air Chief Marshal's optimism and tried to ignore the worry that was gnawing away at her insides.

* * *

They spent the rest of the day going over the attack plan for the following morning. The Air Chief Marshal also took Penny to the Pentagon's firing range to determine her shooting skills. After Penny nailed a handful of targets with long-range weaponry, the Air Chief Marshal determined that she was a good enough shot to operate the secondary weaponry on the helicopter that would be carrying Sheldon, Howard and Raj.

"To be honest, I'm a little surprised that you want... the scientists... to be directly involved in this," Penny remarked after she'd depleted the bullets in a semi-automatic. "Wouldn't it be better if they were on the sidelines?"

"I feel that it is important for your friends to see everything that I see," the Air Chief Marshal explained. "Although our primary objective tomorrow will be to destroy this threat, it is also imperative that we remember what, or who, it is that we are trying to destroy. If anything occurs that hints at the possibility of peace between us and the aliens, I want to have keen minds available that will be capable of looking past strategy and understanding the situation."

Penny raised an eyebrow. "You think there's a chance that the we and the aliens can... get along? Despite the fact that they've wiped out a huge chunk of the United States?"

"As Henry David Thoreau once said, 'The Universe is wider than our views of it.' What seems hostile to us may not be hostile from the aliens' perspective. If the opportunity to reconcile our differences arises, I would prefer to act on it than see more people killed."

Penny's personal opinion was that, regardless of what happened the following day, the aliens needed to be blown to smithereens for killing Leonard and everyone else, but she decided to keep her mouth shut.

When Penny finally collapsed onto a lumpy cot at the end of the day, she found that she was too anxious to sleep. The small office-turned-bedroom around her was spartan and cold and did nothing to calm her nerves. After an hour of tossing and turning, she wandered across the hall and knocked softly on the door to Sheldon's room.

"Is something the matter?" Sheldon asked when he opened the door. He looked tired but not groggy; she suspected he'd been lying awake as well.

"Can't sleep," Penny admitted. Sheldon moved to the side to let her enter, and she smiled a little to herself. _Funny how things change; a week ago, he probably would have stood there until I asked to come in. So many things were different a week ago_.

"Are you ready for tomorrow?" Penny asked, sitting on the edge of his cot. It seemed softer than hers, at least.

"As ready as can be expected, considering the plan was only revealed to me today. Although I certainly have respect for the Air Chief Marshal's experience and optimism, I cannot say that I share his enthusiasm. I feel that our chances of success tomorrow are slim."

"You too, huh?" Penny sighed. "This seems like such a crazy idea. What if our weapons don't do anything? What if they just decide to zap us out of existence with a laser or something?"

"Then we will be dead, and it will be up to someone else to preserve the human race," Sheldon said simply before sitting down next to Penny on the bed.

"I'm scared," Penny whispered, looking over at him with wide eyes. "I feel like death has been chasing us for a week. What if it finally catches up? I'm not ready to die."

"Who is?" Sheldon asked. "The elderly, maybe, who have come to terms with their situation and are ready. But no one in their youth. I'm not ready to go, either, Penny." He gave her a small grin. "I haven't won the Nobel Prize."

Penny chuckled weakly and rested her head against him. "No, you haven't." She closed her eyes and thought about all of the things she wanted to say, if this was to be her last chance. She suddenly wished she'd told her parents that she loved them, and that things between herself and Sheldon made enough sense for her to tell him something similar.

"What did Leonard say to you, when you spoke to him at the hospital?" Penny asked. It was absolutely none of her business and she knew it, but the question had slipped out anyway.

"That is between myself and Leonard," Sheldon said. Penny grimaced in response.

"You're right, I'm sorry," she mumbled, deciding for once not to push him. If they lived past tomorrow, she'd dig it out of him at some point.

If they lived past tomorrow... the weight of the phrase hit Penny like a punch to the stomach, and she almost gasped. An incredible sense of urgency settled in her chest, and she realized that she needed an outlet, something to make her feel human and real. She placed a shaking hand on Sheldon's neck and pulled him toward her. Her kisses were rough and fervent, but he didn't protest or pull away; he seemed to be taking from her the same thing she was taking from him. Penny imagined that he was draining her completely and replacing her fears and worries with something less frightening and lonely.

When Penny's head hit the pillow and their bodies joined together as one, she didn't bother wiping away the tears that were streaming down her cheeks.

* * *

_Ok, so clearly I am not a military strategist for ANY country. I did my best! The big battle (and the climax of the story) is coming up very soon... will Penny, Sheldon and company survive? Do I have any business writing crazy sci-fi fanfiction? Stay tuned to find out! (Here's to hoping it won't take me years to pump out the next chapter; this one was tough to write, but there's only 3 or 4 chapters left for this story! Woooo!)_


	15. Chapter 15

Penny awoke to the relative darkness of pre-dawn minutes before she was sure Sheldon's atomic clock alarm was set to wake them up. Sheldon's arms were wrapped tightly around her, his presence warm and comforting. He hadn't left in the middle of the night or kicked her out afterward; he'd simply held her until they both fell asleep. It was a strange and wondrous and frightening thing, to be lying there with him the day before the world ended.

_Try to be optimistic_, Penny told herself. _Try to enjoy what you have_. She closed her eyes and listened to his even breathing. She wondered if her wayward relationship with Sheldon would have worked out this way if things had stayed the same, if Leonard had lived and the aliens hadn't started a xenocide campaign. Was this just what happened when two friends went through way too many things together, and all at once? Or had they set things in motion the day on the couch, when he'd ran a finger down her arm and she'd felt that strange little pinprick of feeling? Did he love her? If he died today, would his biggest regret be that he didn't have the chance to see things through with her?

_Maybe, maybe not_, Penny thought. She turned in his arms and saw the hard look on his sleeping face, a look of worry and frustration. It was unsettling to see such uncertainty in his features. She whispered his name twice, and his expression relaxed as he pulled himself from sleep.

"Hi," she murmured, a little unsure of what to say.

"Good morning," he responded. He watched her intently, waited for her to speak again. When she didn't, he said, "I am in desperate need of a shower."

Penny chuckled softly. "Me too. Maybe I'll join you."

A ghost of a smile tickled his lips. "Water conservation? Why Penny, I had no idea you were such an environmentalist."

Grinning, Penny settled closer to him. "Maybe we shouldn't get up today."

"Unfortunately, the fate of the world is in our hands."

Penny sighed and tried to ignore the pang in her gut. She watched as Sheldon rolled out of bed and wandered around the room, folding her discarded articles of clothing and rummaging through his bag for bathroom supplies. It was so odd and intimate to see him doing the mundane, daily things done by everyone. Penny felt the pang again and suddenly hoped she would live to have more moments like this with him, moments where he let her into the quiet, personal parts of his life.

A brief knock on the door interrupted Penny's thoughts. "Sheldon?" a voice outside the door said. Without warning, the door swung open — _seriously, who just barges into Sheldon's room_? — and Penny had to shade her eyes from the harsh light of the hallway.

"I can't believe you're just now getting up, I figured you would have bounced out of bed an hour— what the hell?" When Penny's eyes finally adjusted to the light, she realized Howard and Raj were standing in the doorway, staring at her.

_Well, this should be interesting_, she thought.

"Holy Vishnu!" Raj exclaimed, pointing at her like her presence in Sheldon's bed was the most impossible thing in the world. "What are you—"

"This is my room," Sheldon interrupted. "People are not allowed in my room." Penny almost laughed at the ridiculousness of his statement.

"Apparently some people are definitely allowed!" Howard said. "I can't even— when did this— how long have you been—" Howard eventually stopped trying to speak and just let his mouth hang open.

"Dude, Leonard hasn't even been- jeez-" Raj squeaked, but was interrupted by Penny.

"Don't you dare," she snapped, sitting up. She was careful to clutch the blankets to her chest. "This has nothing to do with Leonard. Don't you bring him into this."

"I would like to add that what occurs between Penny and me has nothing to do with either of you," Sheldon said, stepping toward them and putting a hand on both of their chests. "Now, if you will excuse us." He pushed both of them backward and shut the door in their faces.

"Looks like you owe me a couple of limited edition comic books," Penny heard Raj say to Howard from behind the door.

"I thought you were crazy! Son of a bitch!"

Sighing, Penny threw on her clothes and re-opened the door. Both of them were still standing there. She closed the door behind her and pushed both of them forward.

"Look," she began, "I don't _have_ to explain anything to either of you, but because you're friends, I'll say this: Sometimes, stuff just happens between two people and neither of them has a good explanation for why." She stopped them once they were a decent distance from Sheldon's room. "He's my best friend, and with everything that's happened in the past week or so, I guess we both just kind of realized that... that when everything else around you is going to shit, you have to rely on each other to get through it."

"You can rationalize all you like, it's still weird," Howard said. "Like... wow."

"We're not judging you," Raj clarified. "It's just that... it's Sheldon. I mean... _Sheldon_."

"Yeah, well, you both have more important things to worry about," Penny retorted. "And so do I. I'll see you guys soon."

Howard looked at his watch. "All right. But hey, you guys still have time for a quickie if you hur— ouch!" He recoiled when Penny punched him in the arm, hard. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry! We're leaving!"

The unexpected sound of Sheldon's voice made Penny jump when he appeared behind her several seconds later. "I would suggest that you begin getting ready soon. Today is no day for tardiness." His tone was matter-of-fact and perfunctory; the warmth and tenderness from earlier had disappeared. Penny nodded in response as he headed for the bathroom.

"Sheldon?" She said abruptly. He turned and waited, piercing her with his focused gaze. As she stood and tried to think of what she wanted to say, Penny realized that the moment had passed; maybe all of the moments had passed. "Nevermind."

She stared on long after he rounded the corner and disappeared from sight.

* * *

An hour later, Penny was jumpsuit-clad and seated between Raj and Sheldon in the back of the ugliest airplane she had ever seen. She'd said as much to the Air Chief Marshal, who had laughed heartily in response.

"This little beauty is a B-52 Superfortress," he'd said. "We borrowed a handful of them from the air force base in North Dakota."

He'd gone on to explain their expected roles during the mission and had introduced them to the other crew members. Penny was responsible for manual non-guided weaponry, assuming they were able to get close enough to use it. Other than that, she was expected to assist the electronic warfare officer and 'keep the scientists in line', as the Air Chief Marshal had put it with a wink.

The flight to Las Vegas was long, loud, and miserable. Very little was said; the events of the morning, in combination with anxious anticipation, seemed to render everyone speechless. The dull roar of air rushing past drilled into Penny's brain and gave her a fantastic headache. She almost didn't mind the pain, as it gave her something on which she could focus. Howard and Raj were dozing restlessly to her left, and on her right, Sheldon was seated perfectly upright in his seat. His eyes were closed but she doubted he was sleeping.

"We've almost reached the airspace above the craft," one of the navigators told Penny. His voice cut through the noise in her head like a knife.

"Sheldon," she said softly, placing her hand lightly over his. He opened his eyes.

"Are we there yet?" Raj said between yawns.

"Pretty close," Penny responded. Sheldon's hand slipped out from underneath her own as he reached up to massage his temples. Next to them, one of the long-range radio communicators beeped loudly, and a navigator leaned over to grab it.

"This is B-52C, over," he said.

"This is Air Chief Marshal Lloyd in B-52A," said a garbled voice. "We are approaching the bomb zone. Please prepare all weaponry for the drop in T-minus 5 minutes.

"Copy that, sir," the navigator responded. To Penny and the others he said, "I will now open the floor panels so we can keep an eye on what happens. From this altitude, we won't see much detail, but after we drop the first series of bombs we will move closer to assess the damage."

Below them, the floor slid back to reveal the ground below from behind thick panes of glass. Penny was soon able to see the spaceship, and was once again surprised by its size.

"That thing is monstrous," Howard said, awed. "Way bigger than I expected."

Raj snorted. "That's what she said."

"Seriously? We're about to blow up a space ship, and you crack a joke like that?"

"Shut up, dude, I'm just trying to break the ice a little. We're all pretty freaked out."

"Quiet," Sheldon shushed them when the Air Chief Marshal's voice filtered through the radio again.

"Commence drop in T-minus one minute. To our science advisers in B-52C, please report to me what you see once we move closer."

Penny's heart was thumping wildly in her chest. "What do you think will happen?" She asked Sheldon, who was staring at the earth below.

"Probably not much," he said.

The seconds dragged on and on. _Sheldon told me once that time is relative, and now I definitely believe him_, Penny thought as she waited. More than once, she realized she was holding her breath and had to force herself to breathe in and out, in and out.

"Commence drop in T-minus 10 seconds... 9... 8... 7..." Penny could see the muscles in Sheldon's cheek moving as he set his jaw. "6... 5... 4..." Raj was leaning so far forward that his face was nearly pressed to the glass. "3... 2... 1... commence drop! Commence drop!"

The airplane groaned, and several dark and cylindrical somethings slipped from its depths with a metal clang. Penny squinted and watched them fall until they turned into tiny dots against the shiny backdrop of the spaceship. Then, finally, thousands of brilliant flames shot up and engulfed the ship's visage.

"Nice," Howard mumbled.

Four more sets of bombs were dropped, and each produced brief, bright flashes of light that outshone the ship's hull. Penny waited for a defensive response from the ship, but none came. Ten minutes after the last set, the Air Chief Marshal's voice addressed them.

"B-52C, go ahead and descend. Once you're within range, tell me what you see. And Penny, don't be afraid to be on the offensive, if necessary."

"Roger," she said into the communicator. They all peered down intently as they came closer. Details slowly became clear; the ship's hull was unfortunately still intact, and it seemed to be glowing.

"It would appear that the extra-terrestrial craft has... absorbed the energy of the bombs," Sheldon said into the communicator. Penny felt her stomach drop in disappointment. "It is possible that the hull has been weakened, of course, and that subsequent bombings would allow us to break through their defenses, but I find it unlikely that—"

Without warning, the airplane shifted violently downward. The seat belt holding Penny in dug painfully into her stomach. "What's going on?" she yelled at the nearest navigator.

"What's going on?" He yelled in turn to the pilot, who looked frantic.

"I don't know!" the pilot cried, pressing buttons. "I just— I completely lost control! I can't get her to level out! We're falling— we're falling toward the space ship!"

"Shit! Shit!" Penny's mind was reeling in panic. She glanced over at Sheldon and saw real fear in his eyes. "What the hell do we do?"

"There's nothing we can do." He said it so quietly she barely heard him. "It would appear that our efforts were in vain."

"Sheldon!" The plane was spinning now, spiraling endlessly downward.

"I love you guys," Raj said, clutching Penny's arm. She was sure her heart was going to beat its way up her throat and out into the open air. She let out a strangled cry as the plane lurched in a different direction.

"Penny." Sheldon was calm, infinitely calm. He caught her gaze and held it, and suddenly she wasn't afraid. She felt her seat belt snap and heard the raucous crunch of metal against metal.

He grabbed her hand an instant before her world went dark.

* * *

_Shit just got real! Sorry kids, but the other cliffhanger I had in mind was way worse. _

_I need to add another disclaimer about how I know nothing about military aircraft/protocol. I did a little research but a less lazy (and less busy) author would have done more. Thank goodness this is a character-driven fic! _

_Finally, thank you guys so much for your wonderful feedback! Reading your thoughts on the story makes me happy and is very motivating! :) _

_Over and out for now! _


	16. Chapter 16

_I felt so awful about leaving you guys with a cliffhanger that I wrote this chapter in one night. Not that it's gonna fill you with warm, fuzzy feelings... Expect a final chapter, and then maybe an epilogue if you guys ask nicely! ;)_

* * *

"Penny... Penny?" A far-away voice was calling her name. "Penny, please..."

It took a monumental amount of effort for Penny to open her eyes. Sheldon was hovering over her, touching her face. He visibly relaxed when she managed to focus her eyes on him.

"Thank goodness," Sheldon breathed. "Are you hurt? Can you move?"

"I don't know, Sheldon, I haven't tried yet," Penny grumbled. Or, rather, tried to grumble; only half of the words came out correctly. She pushed herself up on her elbows and felt the world spin sickeningly. "Ugh."

Sheldon began checking her over for injuries, ignoring her protests as he unzipped her jumpsuit and gently pressed on every rib. At one she yelped loudly as pain seared through her, and she had to resist a mighty involuntary urge to punch him.

"You have a cracked rib," Sheldon announced. Penny noticed a heavy bruise darkening the skin below one of his eyes.

"Yeah, no shit, Sherlock," Penny said through gritted teeth. "Help me up."

"We appear to be inside of the spacecraft," Sheldon explained as Penny gingerly climbed to her feet with his help. "I first assumed that perhaps our airplane pierced the ship's hull and threw us far from the wreckage, but it is unlikely in that scenario that we would be alive, and I have seen no sign of the wreckage. It is more plausible that we were brought here."

"Brought here?" Penny asked. She remembered the otherworldly creatures she'd seen from Leonard's car a week ago and shuddered. "You think the aliens brought us inside?"

"Someone did," Sheldon said. "Perhaps there is a way out. Let's have a look around."

As they walked, Penny finally took the time to examine her surroundings. They were in a large room that was covered from floor to ceiling with wires and blinking lights. The room looked like it could serve as a control room, but there were no screens and no seats. No sign of life, besides the lonely lights that twinkled like stars in the night sky.

"Could that be a door?" Penny asked, gesturing toward a part of the wall that was unblemished by wires and lights. They looked around and found a strange, touch-sensitive panel. Penny put her hand to it, but nothing happened. "Here, you try."

"I don't see how my hand could be any different from yours, for this purpose," Sheldon muttered, but he placed his hand against the plate anyway. Color fluttered across the plate, and the door slid open.

"That's odd," Sheldon commented before ducking slightly to pass through.

"Maybe you really are an alien," Penny said as she followed.

"Given the circumstances, I do not appreciate your jocularity," Sheldon berated.

They continued on, with every new room looking the same as the last. "I feel like I'm trapped in one of those games you made me play once," Penny remarked as Sheldon pressed his hand against another plate. "It doesn't seem like we're getting anywhere."

"Are you referring to the Lost Woods, in the Ocarina of Time?" Sheldon asked. "At least you had the chance to start over in the game when you made a wrong turn. And there was more than one passage connected to every room. Plus, it was in the woods. The Lost Woods. To be honest, I don't think that was the best comparison—"

"Shut up," Penny muttered.

After nearly an hour, they finally entered a room that was different from the others. Dim lights revealed highly polished floors and mirror-like walls. A brilliant mural of a galaxy was painted meticulously on the ceiling.

"M31," Sheldon whispered. "The galaxy. That's the Andromeda Galaxy."

"Maybe that's where they're from," Penny whispered back. Something about the room compelled her speak carefully and quietly.

Penny wandered around the room, but could find no other doors. There was, however, another panel on the floor, and when Sheldon put his hand against it, the dim lights brightened exponentially.

Something above their heads whirred and came to life. The mural of the Andromeda galaxy began to glow eerily, and a voice boomed through the room and made Penny jump in surprise.

"I see you have awakened," the voice said. Its tone and timbre sounded strangely familiar...

"Yes," Sheldon answered, throwing Penny a puzzled look. "To whom am I speaking?"

"I am... a distant cousin, as the humans would say," the voice remarked brightly. "Welcome home, Sheldon Cooper."

* * *

"We knew you would find your way back to us sooner or later," the voice said. "Clearly, we were correct in our assumption that you would be resourceful enough to survive, in spite of the circumstances."

"Who is 'we'?" Sheldon asked. "And, are you insinuating that you poisoned the food and water supply in an attempt to... find me?"

"Yes, exactly," the voice replied. "'We' are a collective of entities, or perhaps 'souls' is the proper word. Ignoring the religious undertones, of course."

"Of course," Sheldon said, nodding.

"What the hell is going on?" Penny asked, interrupting the conversation between two voices that sounded far too similar.

"In terms of your presence, we are not entirely sure," The voice said. "The ship was programmed to only accept the presence of Sheldon Cooper. That you are here suggests either a flaw in the system, which is statistically unlikely, or close physical proximity between the two of you at the time of entry."

Penny gasped. "You grabbed my hand right before we crashed," she said to Sheldon. "That's how I got in here with you." She looked upward in an attempt to address the voice. "Anyway, what gives you the right to wipe out an entire country? Was that really necessary? Couldn't you have just done a Google search, or something?"

"Wipe out? We are unfamiliar with this terminology. Give us a moment." Silence filled the room, and Penny tried to control her breathing. Her side was aching unbearably and she wasn't sure she would be able to continue standing for much longer.

"Ah, yes. Kill, destroy, decimate. We did no such thing."

"But... you did," Penny said. "You killed our friend. Our neighbors. The President. Almost everybody!"

"The word 'kill' insinuates that we terminated these people. Your understanding of death is too simple. Death of the flesh is not synonymous with death of the soul. Matter can be neither created nor destroyed; this is one physical rule you humans managed to get right, and it applies to both the body and the soul."

"What happens to the souls?" Sheldon asked.

"They are simply recycled," the voice said, matter-of-fact. "Similar to your concept of reincarnation, except again without the religious undertones. The number of souls in existence is unfathomable, but the count does not grow or shrink; souls are sent to different dimensions, to different housings. Certain souls are attached to certain housings as a result of their nature."

Sheldon looked impressed. "Fascinating. What can you tell me about string theory?"

"Sheldon, now is not the time!" Penny muttered. "The... voice, whatever it is... _welcomed you home_." She addressed the ceiling again. "This is definitely not his home."

"I apologize, I was speaking figuratively. We have been analyzing both of you since you began exploring the ship, and I was eager to explore the linguistic nuances of your language. To answer your question: Sheldon Cooper, you are an experiment conducted by us. You are, in fact, one of us; that is, you possess a soul that shares our characteristics. Your soul is very different from the souls that normally take up residence in human bodies."

Penny sunk to the ground next to Sheldon. Jesus Christ, he actually _was_ an alien.

Sheldon seemed unperturbed. "Please present evidence to support your claim."

"Your method of speech and interaction with others is markedly different from that of your friends and colleagues," the voice began. "Your academic successes began at an early age and have never shown a sign of stopping. You cannot be bothered with intimate socio-emotional connections. You feel out of place in most situations and have yet to find someone that you can call your equal. And when you stare up at the night sky, you feel a connection that you can't explain." The voice seemed to pause for effect. "Are these examples sufficient, or do you require more?"

"No, that was sufficient," Sheldon whispered.

Penny climbed to her feet, ignoring the pain that lanced through her. She placed both hands on Sheldon's shoulders and stared at him. "Come on, Sheldon, not all of that applies to you. What about... what about you and me?"

"You and me?" Sheldon frowned. "We have been under severe stress and strain. Who is to say that I haven't been simply reacting as I expected a human to react? Certainly, the things that come naturally to you, the things that you feel and think, are different from the things that come naturally to me. I theorize and solve problems, I prepare and plan, but I don't... love."

The words hit Penny like physical blows. _Of course, of course_. She let her hands slip from his shoulders.

"The reason for our experimentation," the voice continued, "Was to determine whether our souls could adequately survive and thrive in a human vessel. Our current forms have ceased evolving, and our souls require a vessel with less evolutionary history and more pliability and dexterity. The amorphous blobs in which we currently reside do not possess the acute senses of the human body, or proper appendages for the development of fine motor skills."

"So, you have come to study me," Sheldon reasoned.

"Yes. We will take you back to our galaxy and determine whether the human vessel is a viable option. However, from the initial scans we have run, it would appear that your soul has adapted beautifully. We simply need to determine whether the human vessel has left you with any unfavorable defects in personality or behavior that cannot be corrected through genetics."

"What happens to us?" Penny asked, trying not to choke on her tears. "What happens to souls like mine, if the human body works out for you?"

"Well, you are of course welcome to put up a fight, but considering your current level of technological advancement, we doubt you would stand a chance. Thus, your souls will be left with our bodies, which we personally believe are a better fit for the dreamy idealism that seems to affect your kind."

Penny wanted to be mad. She wanted to fight, wanted to discount everything the voice was saying to her and defend her right to her own body. But she had no idea how, and Sheldon's words had taken the wind out of her.

"What if Sheldon doesn't want to leave?" Penny whispered, a final desperate plea.

"Sheldon Cooper, do you want to stay?" The voice was not condescending or angry; it simply asked.

When Penny finally met Sheldon's gaze, she read the answer in his eyes.

"Penny, go," he murmured. "Please go."

"We will take the human to her original group, which is waiting outside. I would suggest leaving soon; a nuclear warhead is already on its way."

"Sheldon..." Penny felt the tears slide down her cheeks. "Please don't leave me. Don't—"

"Goodbye, Penny." He stuck out a formal hand.

Against her better judgment, Penny shook it. When Sheldon withdrew his hand from hers, Penny realized she was holding a tiny, folded slip of paper.

"Goodbye, Human," the voice said. Penny felt a strange static pop in her ears, and suddenly she was standing next to Howard and Raj on the hull of the spacecraft.

"We can't just leave without— Penny! Where the hell did you come from?" Howard exclaimed.

"It's a long story," Penny said. "We have to get out of here, now! There's a nuclear bomb on the way!"

"Seriously? How do you—"

"There's no time!" Penny yelled. "We have to go now!"

"Ok, ok, the B-52A is here and ready to take us. What about Sheldon?"

"Sheldon... Sheldon's not coming." She gripped the piece of paper tightly in her fist.

Howard stared at her for a moment, but she said nothing more. "All right. Let's load up!"

They packed into the airplane and took off as quickly as possible, flying high and fast. Penny suddenly thought of her parents, and Sheldon's.

"I have two places that one of the other airplanes needs to visit," she told the Air Chief Marshal.

"We don't know if there's time—"

"I don't care!" Penny pointed to the places on the map, and the Air Chief Marshal reluctantly obliged. She could do nothing more.

When Penny finally took her seat, she unclenched her fist and unfolded the paper.

Two words were written in Sheldon's meticulous, precise hand: _I'm sorry_.

Penny cried until she had no tears left.


	17. Final Chapter

Weeks later, after a third of the United States had been needlessly rendered unfit for life and a tiny group of American survivors had watched an alien spacecraft rise into the sky and disappear, Penny awoke in her new apartment (or flat, as it was called in London) and realized she wasn't doing herself any favors by moping and feeling miserable. Sheldon was gone— the harsh reality of those words ran her through every time— but there was nothing she could do to bring him back. He'd left her nothing but a statement of contrition, and she had no idea what to make of it; was he sorry for leaving, sorry for breaking her heart, or sorry because he'd had no choice? Would he have been allowed to stay if he'd wanted to? Did any of it even matter?

Penny's worries regarding the things told to her by the aliens gave her nightmares in which her soul was ripped forcibly from her body. Those with whom she shared her fears either gave her a pitying glance or stared at her in disbelief. Terrible rumors swirled through the newspapers, rumors alleging that there were never any aliens at all, that the entire thing was an elaborate ruse intended to give this country or that a justifiable reason to bomb the United States. Anger always bubbled up inside of Penny when she read the headlines, but ultimately it was fruitless to try and explain the truth. Only a handful of people close to her even believed her explanation of Sheldon's disappearance.

"He'll come back for you," Sheldon's grandmother would tell Penny every time she visited the older woman. She (along with Sheldon's mother and sister, and Penny's family) had thankfully escaped before the bomb dropped, and were given generous pensions and visas by the English government.

"What makes you believe that?" Penny would always ask.

"Because he loves you. I saw it in him, clear as day, that time you both stopped by. Them aliens may think he's theirs through and through, but there was only one man in my life that looked at me the way he would look at you, and that was my husband. He ain't gonna give that up, just like that. He has a plan."

During her most recent visit, Penny had sighed in exasperation and nearly spilled her tea in response to the woman's unyielding confidence in her grandson. "But you understand why I can't dwell, or hope, don't you? I can't spend my whole life waiting."

"Of course you can't, dear," Sheldon's grandmother said with a smile. "Go live. He'll find you."

And so Penny_ did_ live. She auditioned for plays in London and actually landed a couple of roles; the directors seemed to like her honest charm, and she loved being able to slip into someone else's skin, if only for a while. Howard and Raj visited once or twice a year (they'd found employment at a respected university in France), and when they were in town, Penny would eat pizza with them and play Halo as though nothing had changed. She took the train to her parents' small farm in southern England on the weekends and helped with chores. Her father, much to her relief, had lost his anger, and they spent many days reminiscing about Nebraska and cleaning shotguns together.

"You miss that boy, don't you?" Penny's father asked one night when he found his daughter on the roof of the house, staring at the heavens.

"This is the only time I let myself wonder about him," Penny murmured. "I do miss him. But it gets a little easier every day."

* * *

One autumn, three years after Sheldon's disappearance, Penny vacationed with Howard and Raj on the northern coast of France. They rented a cottage on the beach and spent their evenings lounging in the sand and drinking cheap French wine.

"You see, right up there is the Andromeda Galaxy, in the constellation Andromeda," pointed Raj, who was drunk and trying to impress two French girls that he and Howard had met at a nearby bar. Penny laughed and rolled her eyes.

"We have a friend there," Howard added casually. "He's an alien."

"_C'est vrai?_" One of the French girls asked. "Is it true? Did your friend kill the United States?"

"No, humans did that," Raj clarified. "But yeah. Maybe someday he'll come back with souvenirs."

"Or return for his lovely lady." Howard gestured toward Penny, and she gave him a small smile.

The French girls looked nonplussed. "You love the alien friend, _oui_?" One of them asked.

"I did," Penny agreed. "But I don't think he's coming back."

"So sad!" lamented the French girls. Penny looked idly upward and said nothing more.

"I'm hungry," Raj slurred after a moment of silence. "Who wants to go get crepes?"

The French girls squealed, and Howard scrambled to his feet. "Penny, you coming?"

"No, I think I'll stay," she said.

"All right." The group wandered noisily into the night, leaving Penny alone to appreciate the warm breeze and the comforting slosh of water against sand.

The stars twinkled brightly above Penny's head. She smiled as she remembered her night with Sheldon on the roof of his grandmother's garage. It seemed like a different life, like a dream. Maybe he was where he belonged, a traveler of the Universe he so dearly loved.

Penny suddenly felt very lonely. "Everything about my life has worked out the way I wanted, but I'm not as happy as I should be," she whispered. "If you're still out there, somewhere, I wonder if you feel the same?"

"I do."

Penny turned, and there he was, silhouetted by the light of the moon. His hair was longer and in complete disarray, and his clothing was tattered and worn, but it was him, it was Sheldon. He was holding a ridiculous bouquet of strange-looking flowers.

"These are for you." He took a step toward Penny and set the flowers down in front of her. "They are flowers from a planet with a name I cannot pronounce. Daily exposure to UV rays will ensure that they never wilt. They'll last forever."

"You've been gone for three years, and you thought it would be a good idea to bring _flowers_?" The emotions running through her were making her tremble.

"I know it isn't enough. I know you have no reason to accept the apology I gave you." He wasn't looking at her. "I came back as quickly as I could. The extra-terrestrials may have mastered faster-than-light travel, but the return trip was still incredibly long."

Despite everything that was running through her brain, Penny found herself saying, "I thought you told me nothing could travel faster than light."

"There's so much I didn't know... about physics, about the Universe. String Theory had only scratched the surface. There's so much more. I learned everything I could while the... my people were studying me."

"Have they decided to use our bodies?" Penny asked. "Is that why you're here?"

Sheldon grinned weakly. "No. I was ultimately a disappointment to them. They quickly discovered that a number of undesirable attributes unique to the human condition had rubbed off on me."

"Such as?"

"It would seem that I can, after all, be bothered with intimate socio-emotional interactions." He knelt down next to her. "Penny, I said those things three years ago because I was afraid of what would happen to you if I didn't agree to go with them. I was afraid they would simply annihilate both of us on the spot if I gave any indication that I wasn't what they were expecting. As it is, I was slated for 'recycling' when I managed to escape."

"Sheldon..."

He held up a hand. "Let me finish. I have not come here to ask for your forgiveness... I'm not asking you for anything. I'm here because I have spent the past three years feeling miserable and guilty and full of regret. Feelings that never plagued me before I met you. I've solved the mysteries of the Universe, visited a different galaxy, and encountered creatures unlike myself in every way... and yet I feel unfulfilled. You are the one great mystery of the Universe that I haven't been able to solve, or replicate, or find anywhere else." He rested his fingers atop hers. "Penny, I love you, and I was an idiot to ever make you think otherwise."

Penny didn't know if she wanted to laugh or cry or punch him in the face. Maybe all three. The Sheldon searching her eyes now was so different from the one that had left her years before; his experiences had given him an air of maturity and otherworldliness. But as he watched her anxiously and waited for a response, he reminded Penny so much of the old Sheldon that she could feel sad, nostalgic tears stinging her eyes.

"A lot of stuff has changed," Penny finally managed to say. "I've made a life for myself. I've... I couldn't wait for you."

"I never expected you to," Sheldon murmured. His voice had a defeated, tired tone. "I can't stay. I am certain my disappearance, as well as that of my pilfered ship, was noticed shortly after my escape. I have to keep moving to avoid putting this planet in danger." He gave Penny one final long look before rising to leave.

Penny felt the panic rise in her breast as she watched him walk away. The part of her that wanted to be bitter and prideful dissolved in an instant, and she remembered the words she'd uttered to the stars minutes before. She thought about the emptiness in her heart that persisted regardless of how happy she felt on the surface, considered the hundreds of nights she'd spent staring at the sky, wondering and wishing. Then, with a jolt of fear, she realized that she would regret it for the rest of her life if she missed this chance.

"Sheldon!" He turned, and she fumbled in her purse, looking for something. When she found what she was looking for, she ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and placed something in his palm.

Sheldon looked down. In his hand rested a tattered, worn piece of paper. The words written upon it were his own.

"I don't need an apology, Sheldon," Penny whispered through her tears. "I need _you_."

A huge, silly grin erupted on Sheldon's face. He gathered her in his arms and held her tightly, as though he was afraid she would disappear when he let go. Penny laughed and cried and kissed his face over and over.

"I really do have to go," Sheldon managed to say between kisses. "I have a plan that will prevent my kind from harming Earth, but it requires that I leave for a number of years. I want to stay, but it isn't possible right now."

"Then I'll go with you," Penny said. When Sheldon protested, she shook her head. "You don't get to make this decision for me. If we start to drive each other crazy, you can always swing by and drop me off at my parents' house."

Sheldon opened his mouth to respond, but the sound of nearby bellowing interrupted him. Penny looked over and saw Raj and Howard running toward them at top speed. The forgotten French girls trailed behind, munching on crepes.

"Dude, Sheldon, is that you?" Raj nearly tackled him to the ground. Sheldon chuckled and hugged his friend back.

"We thought you were a done deal!" Howard exclaimed, stepping up for his hug.

"I am most certainly alive and well," Sheldon said, smiling. "But I can't stay. I'm leaving, for the time being."

"_We're_ leaving," Penny clarified. "He wants me to stay, but I'm going anyway."

Raj looked worried. "Hey, you'll be back, right? What do you want us to tell your parents? What about your flat, your job?"

"Tell my parents the truth. Tell the Air Chief Marshal what's going on, and he'll take care of the rest, I'm sure. And yeah, we'll be back."

"I have so much to tell both of you," Sheldon began. "The world of theoretical physics will be turned upside-down when I reveal everything I've learned—"

Penny elbowed him. "We have to go, remember?"

"Yes, yes. Goodbye. We will find you when we return."

"Wait just a second," Raj said, turning. "Hey, girls, our alien friend is here! You should come meet him!" He frowned when he heard the girls laugh and then point behind him in surprise. He spun around quickly, but all he could see was a vast expanse of ocean and sky.

Sheldon and Penny were already gone.

* * *

When Penny opened her eyes and shook the ringing from her ears, she was greeted by the sight of what she guessed was Sheldon's spaceship.

"Sorry, I haven't quite mastered the art of teleportation," Sheldon explained. "It's a rather convenient trait possessed by my kind." He held out a hand, and Penny took it without hesitation.

"So, where are we going?" She asked, intertwining her fingers with his.

"You'll see," he whispered, the secrets of the Universe dancing across his features. "You'll see."

* * *

_fjdklajfkajfklajflsf DONE. HOLY CRAP, GUYS. _

_I spent a long time trying to figure out how I wanted this to go. In the end, I decided that these characters had been through too much crap to have an unhappy ending. Kudos to my1alias for basically nailing my idea on the head in the reviews. _

_Unsatisfied with this sugary-sweet ending? Want an epilogue detailing the space adventures of our dynamic duo? Do let me know! _

_Finally, thanks to the folks over at Paradox and all 140+ of you on here who have stuck it out to the end. This is the first real story I've actually finished writing in about twelve years, and I couldn't have done it without your support and encouragement. Expect much, much more from me in the near future!_


End file.
